I'm A Fighter (CURRENTLY BEING REWRITTEN)

Chapter 3

LILYS POV
     I woke up yawning, rubbing the sleep out of my eyes. I was actually in a good mood for once, until I remembered last night.
'He saw me! Maybe he didn't recognize me...?'
I glanced at my clock, seeing it was 7:15 am!
I groaned as I went off to get ready.
     Thirty minutes later and I was in my Bring Me The Horizon hoodie, jeans, and dark makeup. I put my iPod on shuffle and shoved it in my back pack. I swung my backpack over my shoulder, grabbing a granola bar to eat on the way. Now that I wasn't in a rush, I started thinking about Drake.
'Why was he at the arena? Does he know who I really am? The seemingly shy, emo outcast? I don't know, I don't know, I don't know.'
I tried to push the thoughts out of my mind. Unsuccessfully.
'Could I really allow myself to get close to another person? After what happened with Nicholas...no. I couldn't think about him. I had to focus. Keep up appearances.'
     I pushed all thoughts of Nicholas and Drake out of my mind. I looked ahead to see the school gates.
'Here's to another day of torture.'
I paused with my hand on the door, before pushing it open.
     I quickly shuffled down the hall, ignoring the ever-present shoves and names. I sighed as I got to my locker. I opened it and started putting my stuff in. Suddenly I heard a familiar whisper behind me.
"Hey emo freak." I turned around to see Brittney behind me. I had enough. I couldn't deal with it today.
"I don't have time for your crap today," I said. Brittney looked shocked. A crowd started forming. I saw Drake in the back. Since my head was down, he hadn't recognized me until now, when I looked Britney in the face.
"What did you just say, freak?" She demanded.
"I said," I pronounced this part very slowly so she would understand. "I. Don't. Have. Time. For. Your. Crap. Today. Do you not understand english, or can you just not get it through your thick skull?" I shot back. I knew I should shut my mouth. I was blowing my cover. But I couldn't help it. She had pushed me to the brink. She looked appalled that I had actually defended myself. I saw Drake looking between me and Britney. My cover was blown. He knew who I was. I might as well just come out with it. Well most of it anyways.
"You think you can talk to ME that way?!?" She yelled.
I got up in her face, pushing her back as I said, "Yes, I do."
She looked horrified for a minute before recovering. Then a sly look came across her face as she said,
"You're the reason Nicholas isn't here. What gives you the right to say anything?"
     Suddenly my wall came crumbling down. I was the same scared little girl that I was two years ago. Tears filled my eyes as I dropped my bag and ran. I heard people calling me as I ran. But I didn't care. I ran to my favourite place, a treehouse in the middle of the forest. I climbed the ladder with trembling hands. I got inside and collapsed, curling up in a ball against the wall.
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Brittney's POV
     I smirked in triumph at the anguish that crossed her face. Serves her right. Nicholas was supposed to be MINE. Then he dumped me for little miss "thinks she's all that." She deserves every bit of torment I give her. She should have known better. And it's true. He's not here. All because of her.
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Lily's POV
     I frantically clawed at the secret compartment that held the thing that had been, for awhile, my only friend. I finally got it open and grabbed my favourite razor. It was wicked sharp. I needed this. I deserved this. I finally took it out and brought it to my wrist. I was about to break the skin when I heard someone's voice. I looked up to see Drake.
"Iris?"
"D-don't move. I'll d-do it," I stuttered.
"What happened? Are you okay? Please don't do this," He begged.
"I have to. It's the only way to pay for my mistake. It's all my fault. Everything. She..she's right. It's not like I have any reason to stay. N-no one cares about me. No one needs me. My parents are fine on their own. My best friend left me so she wouldn't suffer. I'm all alone!" I cried. His eyes widened.
"You are not alone! I...I don't know you very well, but I want to. I want to be your friend. You saved me. You didn't have to. I don't care what some girl says. Please, just drop the blade so we can talk this out," he spoke calmly. His eyes were welling up in tears. I looked him in the eye, making a sudden decision.
     I dropped the razor. Immediately, I started sobbing. He rushed over, his eyes asking permission to hold me. I threw myself into his open arms. We stayed like that, him hugging me, me crying uncontrollably. After about twenty minutes, I had calmed down.
"Can I ask something?" He asked. I nodded in reply.
"What was Britney talking about?" He asked softly.
I looked at him for a second, deciding I could trust him. And it is then that he learned my deepest secret.
     "It all started in second grade," I started. "Nicholas and I were best friends. We did everything together. Ate, played, talked. He even helped me through my parents separation. They decided they couldn't live without each other, and everything was okay, just like he promised. As long as he was there, even if things went wrong, everything would turn out really great in the end. We started dating in ninth grade, when he asked me out. We were the perfect couple. So happy, carefree."
     Tears sparked at my eyes again, but I blinked them away. Drake nodded at me to continue. I took a deep breath to calm myself down. "We dated until tenth grade. Brittney was always jealous because she had a crush on him. But he only wanted me. One day, we were at the bank, because I asked him to come with me to take some money out of my account. He wanted to stay home cause he was tired but I convinced him to because then we could go hang out afterwards. While we were there.... a man with a mask came in with a gun, telling everyone to get down. We dropped to the floor but....I thought I could save everyone. I-I snuck over to the alarm, and pulled it. I didn't know the consequences. He aimed his gun at me. Just as he pulled the trigger...."
     I choked on my words. It was so hard to talk with this lump in my throat. I forced myself to continue.
"N-N-Nicholas threw himself in front of me, and the b-bullet hit him in the chest. He died at the scene. It was all my fault. If I hadn't pulled that alarm..." I started sobbing again. "I k-k-killed him!" I exclaimed, before bursting into tears again. Once I had calmed down again, I continued.
"After that, I changed. Brittney started bullying me. My best friend Sylvia...she's a lesbian. She couldn't risk anyone finding out. Anyone getting suspicious. If anyone knew...She couldn't take that. So she abandoned me. That was the final straw. I became depressed. I started self-harming, I thought bad thoughts about myself. I just wanted to find a release. I tried to commit suicide. I wanted to learn to fight, so I could protect myself if that ever happened again. I wasn't doing good. But then, I met Ally. Ally helped me, trained me to fight, and it turned out I was pretty good. So I stopped cutting, and put that negative energy into fighting. But I kept my emo rep in school. I don't know what they would say if they found out who I really am."
     I finished with a sigh. Even though I had only known him for a day, I felt like I could trust Drake. I haven't felt like I could trust someone like that since Nicholas died. Drake, who had simply been listening quietly, suddenly took me firmly by the shoulders, looking me in the eyes.
"It's not your fault. It's no ones fault. Everything happens for a reason. Which means this happened for a reason too. You're gonna be okay. I'm here for you."
     He pulled me into his chest again and hugged me. And at that moment, I knew. Even though it was crazy, even though it went against everything I knew, I let myself hug him back.