Where Was It That We Last Left Off?

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Asteria:

I start blowing out my candles, still not entirely ready to leave my bath but the water is getting cold. When I'm wrapped in my favorite robe and I have my slippers on I step out and make my way to my room. Davey hesitates when he sees me walk in. He isn't wearing a shirt and I see the scar from his accident. I'm taken back to high school in a flashback but I'm snapped out of it when he finally speaks.

"Sorry, I didn't realize you were actually going to get out. Um...Let me just..." He pulls a hoodie over his head and starts heading out of my room but he doesn't leave without mumbling something. "You're very beautiful, Asteria."

The words linger in the air even after the door has shut and I haven't moved from my place. He never says those kinds of things like that. Not in that tone. Something makes me lock the door before I start changing. The dynamic of our friendship has changed completely and I don't know what it is. Maybe it's just the time we've spent apart. Maybe it's just an awkward distance.

I open my closet and go to grab a shirt to wear for pajamas but end up looking through my hamper. I'm ecstatic when I find one of Brendon's dirty shirts from when he stayed over and I welcome his scent as I pull it over my head. I pull on one of his hoodies as well and the smell of Brendon and my lavender bubble bath make me instantly sleepy. I put on my warmest pair of pajama pants and turn the heater up. It's getting cold early this year. I'm thankful for the warmth coming from the kitchen and the smell of chocolate filling the entire apartment.

"What made you want to make brownies?" I ask Davey.

"They're good comfort food, aren't they? You seem...really sad." He shoves the rest of his brownie into his mouth and you would think he's the sad one. Maybe he is...

"So do you."

"Me? I'm never sad," he laughs. "Lonely maybe, but never sad."

My heart aches for him. I'm the reason he doesn't have a girlfriend most likely.

"Why don't you go and get a few numbers or something? Why are you here? You should meet someone. You know, for more than just sex."

"I guess that's the problem. I think the reason why I was so focused on you not being with him is because he reminded me of me. And I wouldn't want you to be with me...that's why....never mind."

"David, you're being weird."

"Sorry, I'll stop. I'm actually going to get some sleep if that's okay, you can take the brownies to your room."

"Nah, I have to be careful. I've been eating really junky lately and I want to still fit my dress for the not holiday party," I say with a small laugh.

"You got your dress already?" He asks, surprised.

"Yeah. I got it two weeks ago."

"Where?"

"That dress shop at the mall that always has the really pretty gowns."

"That place is so expensive! How did you pay for it?" he asks me. I awkwardly look side to side. He starts laughing.

"Next time you talk to Bee tell him I want in on the sugar daddy deal," he laughs. I throw one of the couch pillows at him and he laughs even harder. There we go, back to the old Asteria and Davey.

"Good night, munchkin."

"Good night, asswhipe."

When I get back to my room I walk in just in time to see my phone ringing. It's Brendon. I quickly answer.

"Babe?" No response just shuffling noises. "Brendon?"

I hear muffled talking and realize he's pocket dialed me. I realize he's talking to a woman and try to take a deep breath before my temper gets the best of me.

"What is she to you anyway? She's just another game, we both know I was the only thing you took seriously," says the female voice. It takes me a moment to realize she's talking about me.

"Don't say that. Don't act like that," he pleads.

"Like what? You need to learn to face your problems, Brendon. It's been years and not once have I heard an apology from you."

"I wrote to you."

"The key word in that sentence is heard. After everything you did to me you could have at least apologized in person."

"If you're still mad then why are you here?" he asks angrily. What are they talking about? What did he do? I know I shouldn't be listening but I can't help it. And suddenly, I hear the sentence that turns my boyfriend into a monster...

"You know what, I'm sorry...You're right. I never should have lied to you about that...I never should have told you that I loved you just to get what I wanted. I'm sorry..."

"You're still messing up. You probably haven't told her anything about me, have you?" She asks. My blood boils.

"No," he says quietly. "I'm not ready to tell her that..."

"Because you know she'll leave you." There's a bitterness in the woman's voice.

"Yes. She will...She's a virgin." The girl lets out a loud and sarcastic laugh.

"That's what you do I guess. You just destroy what's pure." I don't know if I can hear anything else without hating Brendon. I hang up and lie on my bed, but I hear his apology over and over and over as I try to sleep...

I shouldn't have told you that I loved you just to get what I wanted.

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