Our Space

Chapter 14

The conversation shifted to the family of the Prophet and they were discussing the wonderful characters of the grandsons of the Prophet (peace be upon him).

"I'm sorry to interrupt, but speaking about family, I'm still thinking about your family. You should have someone here with you. But I understand sometimes circumstances don't allow that so is it okay if I could speak to your dad or something??" Uncle Irfan asked and Sami was caught off guard. His mind went blank as he started to feel panicked.

"Well, yeah. Okay. Erm... You want to er... Phone them?"

"Yeah. Actually, I think it'll be better to phone your mum and get my wife to speak to her. Usually my wife is present in meetings making conversations with the mother. Since your mum couldn't come, she decided to sit out today. But it would be good if she could speak to your mum while we continue."

Sami hadn't even informed his mother of this visit. She knew he was looking to marry but he didn't inform her of specific meetings. He just gave her a general outline of what was going on.

"I guess er... you could but... but she might be a little bit... busy. Yeah, she might... be busy." The stutter was back in full force making Sami feel even more nervous.

"Are you okay?" Uncle Irfan asked, and Sami nodded. "You don't look okay. Is there something we need to know about your parents?"

"No! I mean... well... I er..." Sami sighed, unable to think up a response. If he gave his mother's number and she received a phone call, clueless about who the woman was and why she was phoning, that would make him look bad. But not giving his mother's number also made him look bad. He so desperately wanted to find an excuse but he felt stuck.

"Okay, seriously, what's the deal with your parents?" Uncle Irfan asked bluntly. He was one of those people who naturally looked stern. Combining that with his actual stern face made him frightening. And his tone while asking these difficult questions didn't make anything easier.

"We're sort of... distant," Sami managed to say, being honest. He couldn't lie and he didn't know what else to say. He decided honesty was his best chance.

"Why?"

"I... don't know. Always have been... distant."

"So why haven't you ever tried closing the distance?"

"I have!" Sami said, defensively.

"How?" He asked and Sami looked towards Radia, hoping she'd be able to help. Getting the hint, Radia spoke up.

"Dad, I think you're scaring him. This is clearly a sensitive issue and bombarding him with questions isn't the way to go."

"Do your parents even know you're here?" Uncle Irfan asked, ignoring his daughter.

By now, the room was starting to spin and Sami was losing control over his breathing. He could feel a panic attack coming on. The last thing he wanted was to expose his issues in front of these people, in front of Radia, in their first meeting.

But he'd messed up anyway. What difference did it make if he did have a panic attack in front of them? Whether he stayed or left, the results were going to be the same. So Sami did what he thought would be the easiest way out.

"I'm so sorry... But I... I gotta go. Thank you... for the tea and... and for your time. Asalamu'alaykum," Sami said as he rushed to the door.

"Dad, stop him!" He heard Radia say before he ran out of the door. Once he was outside, he managed a few steps away from the house before he sat himself down on the pavement, letting the panic attack consume him. At that moment, he didn't care who was around him and who could see him.