Chapter 14

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Cold.

Cold.

That's all that exists now. Cold cold cold. Cold filling the empty space in my heart where Anakin once was. Cold exists in place of the Republic which I loved, fought for, every waking moment of my life. I will fight to restore it even if it kills me.

Would it be so hard, so complex, so futile, if I simply...stopped? Stopped fighting for what I believe in? Because, in retrospect, there is nothing left to fight for. No one left to form an army. If I lived, I would be a burden, an impossible weight. Sorrow, loss and pain, merged into a human body. The body of the idealistic senator. I see now, that she died in childbirth. That the force did not bring her back into the pain that is the world of the living. It brought back her body, filled the empty shell with pain, sorrow, emotion, and left it in the position that the senator abandoned in death. Pitted against friends, burdened with two children, devoid of love. This...phantom, had no trouble leaving her children behind. Because they weren't her children. The children were conceived of love, of joy, of happiness. The phantom does not know happiness, has never experienced it, only has memories of this vague, abstract emotion.

That's not true.

It is.

Padme, you are the same person that you always were.

No, I've changed.

True, but you have not changed so much that happiness is only a memory. You must redeem Anakin Skywalker. Then, you will be free of this torment.

But how?

That is for you to discover and you to know.

The force. I am talking to the force. It's guiding me somehow.

The phantom is diminishing.

Padme Amidala is returning.

There is light.

There is hope.

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The light is blinding, even though my eyelids are tightly squeezed shut. As my breaths become deeper and longer, cold, crisp air, like that of a hospital, fills my lungs. A clinical smell, like antibiotics fills my nose. The left side of my face is pressed against a cold, hard surface. My eyelids slowly prise open. If the light was blinding before, it is extremely blinding now. Slowly, I register machines hanging in a circle above me and-
I stiffen slightly as I see some sort of claw holding Vader's mask. I glance downwards to see Anakin on some sort of chair, staring at me.
"Hi." He says, the thin line that is his mouth opening and closing with every word.
I carefully prop myself up onto one elbow. "Hi?" I snap, an edge of anger to her voice "Hi? Is that all you have to say to me? Force, you've got some nerve."
Anakin raises a hairless eyebrow "So have you, apparently. Locking me in your own cell. But also an ounce of stupidity too, what with forgetting that I, well, had a lightsaber."
I narrow my eyes "Well, that thought seemed to have slipped my mind. Anyway, where are we?"
"In my breathing chamber." Anakin says "It's where my mask filters get changed, I can eat and also the only place I can properly survive in without my mask on."
I raise an eyebrow suggestively "And I am here because...?"
Anakin sighs "Because I wanted to talk to you face to face, without Vader in between us."
"What's there to talk about?" I ask "Aside from you turning me over to Emperor Paininbutt."
Anakin stands up and walks over to me "Firstly Padme, where the force did you get Emperor Paininthebutt from? Secondly, I am not turning you over to Palpatine."
"And I'm supposed to believe that because..." I say
"Because...I love you." Anakin whispers, bending down "And I want you to be safe. Somehow, I doubt handing you over to Palpatine will do that."
"Ani..." I whisper "Why then, why did you turn?"
"Precisely what I just said." Anakin says, blue eyes staring into my own.
It hits me. Anakin did turn to the dark side for power. Power to save me from dying. Because I know now, that the nightmares he had. They were of me. Was that why I came back to life? Anakin used the dark side? No, the dark side gives one power, but the power just comes easier than that of a Jedi. Besides, nothing can bring anyone back from the dead, except the force itself.
"Anakin Skywalker wouldn't have killed younglings." I whisper "Anakin Skywalker wouldn't have fought his friends. Anakin is gone."
Anakin sighs and leans down till he is nose to nose with me. "Anakin Skywalker." He whispers "Is still here."

And then we kiss.
It's very different to the other kisses we have exchanged. Anakin's flaky, tissue like burnt skin is pressed up against my own. His chapped lips press against mine with more ferocity, intensity than before. But our passion, our love is still there.
The love that will never die.

When we eventually break apart, I smile at Anakin and he smiles back. "You can't stay here Padme." He says.
"I know." I reply "But how can I get away without detection?"
Anakin sighs in exasperation. "I have a plan, but I need your full cooperation for it to work."
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"You ready?" Anakin whispers, his mechanical breathing filling the air.
I take a deep breath, fingering the quick release button on my handcuffs. "Ready." I say.
"Good." Anakin whispers.
Twenty four hours after our conversation in his breathing pod, Anakin's decked out in his full suit again, and I'm about to go on an Imperial shuttle to a military prison on Bespin. Well, that's the cover story anyway. In reality, I have quick release handcuffs on, a concealed blaster in my leggings and a force connection to Anakin that he taught me how to use. The point?
Those stormtroopers won't know what hit them.

As I'm marched into the shuttle by my escort of six stormtroopers. As the ramp begins to close, I sneak one last glance at Anakin, who's staring at the shuttle impassively.
I love you. I say through the force.
There is a short pause before he replies.
I know.

I wait until the shuttle is in hyperspace before undoing my handcuffs. By the time the stormtroopers are aware of the sound of the cuffs falling to the ground, two are already dead. As they grab their guns, I blast two more. Ten seconds later, six stormtroopers are lying on the floor.
Too easy, I think.
I then walk into the cockpit and change the coordinates from that of Bespin to Danttoine, where Anakin has set up. Safe house for me. Checking the droid manning the controls hasn't noticed the change, I sneak back out and send a message via the force to Anakin.
Done.

As the blurred lines of hyperspace slow down and merge into millions of stars and, eventually, the planet Dantooine. Good. So it is possible to change the coordinates mid-hyperspace wthout, I don't know, spontaneously combusting or something like that. I breath a sigh of relief. Suddenly, a massive jolt shakes the ship and I'm thrown backwards onto the ground. "What the..." I say, rubbing the back of my head as I pick myself of the ground.

I peer back out the window to see...Hyperspace. What? But we were just? Anakin? The droid?

 Then it hits me.

The droid.

It's been hijacked.

I race over to the cockpit door, yanking on the handle. "HEY!" I yell, shaking the handle viciously.

No response. Of course, the only thing other than me on this ship is a hijacked flight droid. A beeping sound fills my  ears. I recognise it. The oxygen level is low. Droids don't need oxygen. I do.

The ground comes rushing up to meet me.

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A cold haunting voice, the one that's lingered at the edge of my nightmares, speaks to me through the darkness.

"Hello Senator Amidala. It's been a long time."


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