Dear Shay,
It's been nearly two years since I last saw you. I have not met a single person with eyes as grey as yours and with those unique specks of green. I miss having a mentor, but most importantly I miss my sister. I'm confused as of your departure. Why you? Why then and not twenty years later? Am I the only one still having this pain?
The point is you Shay are dearly missed. I have a void in my chest, and its not shrinking nor is it leaving. I've been told life is better after death, but my life isn't life without you. I might as well be considered dead, I walk in a constant cycle of do this and do that. Never really paying attention or overthinking things. I've lost my other half. When a sister dies, do you simply loose one or do you always have one? I've taken into consideration that half of my equation is gone and I'm not sure how to solve what is left. I'll be graduating in nearly a year and a half. You were already finished with your career, you were in fact older. I decided nursing was a good path but now I doubt I can handle it. I lost you in those dreaded hospitals. I hate hospitals you know? I've always hated them but now more than ever I look away. I can't bear to think of the month I spent hoping you'd look at me with those eyes I loved the most.
The heat you released in that month warmed my hand. Now looking back it chills my body to the core. I can't describe the feeling of loss. It's just there inside me. I feel it with each step I take. Everyone needs a little help coping, and I've worked on it. Others have tried but it's not going anywhere. You aren't going anywhere. You sit in the back of my mind. You always will. I'm not sure how I feel about it yet.
Yours truly,
Liza
YOU ARE READING
Letters to My Bestfriend
Non-FictionHere are a series of letters of my every day life with my best friend on the hospital bed fighting for her life. Here you get an insight on what goes on in my head and what happens due to her condition.
