You And I: Sequel

Chapter Twenty Three

February 20. (9 days before court)

***Peeta's POV***

I wake with a start which is completely out of character for my night terrors. I sit up breathing heavy, kind of like Katniss does when she gets them. Its not my fault, this dream was so different than any other dream I've had.

"Peeta, it's okay." She says beside me. I don't focus on her I lift my left hand to the side of my head where I took the blow. When I apply pressure and I don't feel pain is when I look over at Katniss.

"Calm down dear." She says and I nod, trying to control my breathing. What made that nightmare feel so real was I've already lived it, many times over.

"I'm fine." I tell her though I'm not sure I am. I lift my hand to my lip and realize it's not cut. There is no blood, no bruises, I'm fine.

"What was that about?" She says quietly. I know she is worried about my well being and that's why I have to tell her. Its not something I've really discussed with her except in a very broad description.

The only reason is because I never wanted Katniss to look at her differently than the kind person she is now because she truly did change. And her knowing could effect their relationship.

"My mom." I say. I'm not exactly sure what brought on that nightmare because it rarely ever crosses my mind anymore. The only time I think about it is when I look in the mirror and see the scar on the right side of my jawline. I got that scar in the worse and scariest way possible.

"What about her?"

"I just had a dream of the old her is all." Like I said, Katniss knows the very broad understanding of my mother's abusive nature. Most details are kept within the family and not spoken of. "I did something, I didn't mean to do it but I did and I cant remember." I find myself stuttering.

"Peeta please stay calm." She runs her thumb over the top of my hand. I take a deep breath.

"She found some kitchen utensil. Either a spoon or a spatula, I don't know. And she chased me with it at first." I stop myself to keep myself contained, taking another deep breath. I just can't stand to think of my mom like this. "She called me every name in the book while she did. When she finally had my cornered was she. She started hitting me."

I touch my finger to my scar, the same way I do every time I talk about the old mom.The scar she gave me in the most terrifying way.

My breathing speeds up again as I remember the nightmare, and upon closing my eyes all I can see is her standing there, the same wild look she had in her eye before she would beat me.

"Peeta you have to relax." I hear but I ignore her. Instead I put my hands over my ears as I begin to flashback to when I was younger.

'You are worthless Peeta, a huge mistake. I wish you were never born!' She yelled at me when I was twelve and messed up a cake in the bakery. Too much icing on a cake, why did I add that much icing? Why did I mess up?

'You won't amount to anything, why would you try? It will only leave you left in failure. Pretty much any route you go will lead you to failure.' When I was 17 and mentioned becoming a doctor. I wanted so badly to help sick people get better and watch them recover but after that night I decided to just let it go.

'Get out of here, I never want to see you again!' That day I was late from school which meant I was late on my chores and she had company coming over that night. She needed the dishes done and the rooms cleaned.

'I hate you.' Before I left for college, the morning I was suppose to leave I dropped one of her expensive vases, one that her mother gave to her. I tried to apologize but when she saw the shattered pieces she said that.