Red-Heads On The Battle Front

20. 2 AM and WHY

"Things about Devon Whitfield that made her feel nicer towards him? What does that even mean?" May wondered aloud. I shrugged and absentmindedly wiped my glasses clean.
"I don't know. She wouldn't tell me." I looked up "Actually, maybe it's from what I overheard"
"What you overheard?"
I nodded "Other than agreeing to let the pranking go on, Mrs. Whitfield started on why they'd come back. I didn't tell you because I didn't think it was important" May's eyes widened
"You're stupid, Gwen. If I were you, I'd want to know why he came back. After so many years..." she trailed off, looking thoughtful. I shrugged again and jammed my now clean glasses onto the bridge of my nose. She narrowed her eyes at my nonchalant look
"Are you telling me you're not even the slightest bit curious?"
I shrugged again "I couldn't, quite frankly, care in the slightest." She continue looking at me steadily
"What? Don't give me that look. All I'm wondering about is if the next thing I'm going to pull on him will be a little bad or the worst." I smirked at the thought.
"Oh no you don't"
"What? Why?"
"Because you've already gotten one over him. It's not fair."
"This isn't about being fair you know. I'm stuck with him for a majority of my days all because he stole one library seat." I sulked. May didn't let up.
"Still ain't fair, Gwen"
"Like I said it isn't about being fair!"
"You're incorrigible"
My temper flared at this and I said bitingly "We'll see how you'd like it if-"
"Don't even go there. I'd handle it better. You know that."
"You know what? I'm done having this conversation" I fumed, even though a part of me knew she was right. May wouldn't be blundering around making life hell for herself or him. She'd set things straight and move on with my life. But that wasn't me.
"Gwen-"
"I'll talk to you later" I slammed the laptop down and whirled around to face my bed. I would play a prank. And it'd be worth it.

Except, I seemed to be getting into a lot of fights these days, with May, with Gabby, all over one stupid boy. And it wasn't a very book-y situation either. I'd show them.

Although I was keenly aware of how childish it was, I pulled a little notebook towards me and opened it to face the wonders it held. You guessed it: I had a prank notebook. It detailed every prank I'd played on Devon Whitfield, and every prank I was to play – every outline, sketch and skeleton of all things wonderful. I hadn't maintained it, initially, but then all the scrap pieces of paper that had little sketches (bad ones, but still sketches) and notes came together into one notebook. The first few pages were only summaries – of when I stole his book nearly a month ago, of the hair-dye prank, of the boxers on the roof and, the latest, cellophaning his car. The notebook made me happy and I smirked evilly as I sketched out the next prank I would play. May's words nagged me from the corner of my mind, but I shook them off. This was war after all.

ᴥ ᴥ ᴥ

The Sorting Hat's voice mumbled quietly in my ear, about being resourceful and intelligent, "And although there is cunning, the desire to learn overpowers it" I waited impatiently. Come on, come on, come on...

"Ravenclaw!"

I cheered along with my house as my tie magically turned blue. This was going to be amazi-

Splat!

"Wha...?" I woke up groggily, my foot felt cold and...slimy?

Splat!

I got a face-full of egg and I gagged and sat up, spluttering. I would've screamed but that would mean getting more egg down my throat than I already had. I hopped to the bathroom and glared sleepily at my reflection. My egg covered face was a scowling beauty, a wonder to behold. Before I could wash it off another Splat resounded in the bathroom. The egg fell, missing me by an inch. Oh gods.

When I successfully got all the egg out of my facial orifices (and from between my toes), ignoring the occasional Splat that came from my room, I looked at the ceiling. A piece of tape hung there. Eggs. Taped to my ceiling. Who did that sound like?

I muttered obscenities under my breath, cursing my mother for giving Mr. Moron the keys to our house. Although, she probably thinks I deserve it.

My room was a combination of egg-shell and wet, sliminess and my sheets...let's not even talk about my sheets. They were disgusting. The smell wasn't too pleasant either. I groaned at the thought of having to clean this up. My mother, dearest as she was, wouldn't even twitch a muscle in an attempt to help me.

It was 2 AM.

I sighed. At least now I could plan back a wind-up that would make him regret life even more than I did right now. Yes, it's horrible for me right now. No, I'm not going to rage. I'm way too tired and the quicker I get this done, the quicker I can Skype May so she won't be mad at me for slamming the proverbial door in her face.

I wish I could fly on the brooms I was going to clean this mess with.

By the time I was done, it was nearly four am. I had all my sheets in the dryer, after having been washed (twice) to get rid of the egg smell. The vacuum was no use and I was yelled at my Celia for attempting to use it at 3 AM to clean up this eggy mess. Mop and broom it had to be. At least the room smelt better.

I yawned and rubbed my eyes, opened my laptop and proceeded to Skype May. When she eventually did pick up, she was scowling.

"What now?"
"Can I prank him now?" I asked, and then proceeded to explain the whole egg thing to her. She looked mildly impressed, but then quickly rearranged her features to resemble mine lest I got pissed off.
"Yes, I suppose you can. Karma's a bitch." she said in a mild tone. I scowled, but then smirked. Oh this was going to be way worse than he could ever imagine it to be. You could say it was going to be...eggceptional.

 ᴥ ᴥ ᴥ ᴥ ᴥ ᴥ

A/N: Hi hi hi. So I guess the updates are rolling in! Halfway there for this book to be all done ^_^ I'm so glad I'm working on this project because life is so frustrating right now. Honestly, they should be teaching us how to apply for college and student loans and all that in school rather than crap classes that teach you less than monkey nuts do. -.-' Mini-rant over promise. xP 

Anyway, Ship Hippo is off the dock and is heading out through shallow water. It has set sail! The next chapter is going to be fun af :3 Give me a week to finish writing it, kayy? 

In the mean time, Keep Calm and Ship Ship Hippo.

xxx
Sage