Shoot The Jerk

Chapter 15: The Amazing Girl Who Puked On Kayla.

 “—to Kayla…Earth to Kayla…Earth to Kayla!”

I focused my mind on the present and Martha was waving her hands in front of my face. I blinked.

 “Huh?”

 “Thank god! I’ve been doing that for the past five minutes.”

 “Really?”

 “Kidding. Just the past four minutes and sixty seconds. So, what were you thinking about?”

 “The day Matt turns into a heartless player.”

 “He’s already halfway there. We have to do something Kay.” She looked sad, and that made me feel even sadder.

 “We need to find him a girlfriend.” She said anxiously.

 Then I had a brainwave.

 “You!”

 “What?” Martha asked, bewildered.

 “You be his girlfriend!”

 “No.” She said flatly.

 “Why?”

 “Why? He’s my friend! I don’t like him like that!”

 “You don’t have to have sex with him. Just keep him busy.”

 “Did you just listen to yourself right now?” 

“Duh. I have ears don’t I?”

 “Shut up. I won’t do it.”

 “C’mon, Martha. You’re always doing adventurous stuff. Just take the jump. Maybe you’ll fall in love with him!”

 “That would be even worse!”

 Yeah it would be worse if he didn’t love her back, but whatever; she should do this for a friend.

 “Listen to me, Martha. Matt is on the road that leads straight to ruin. I’m not asking for much, just some time with him. I’ve never wished more in my life that I could be attracted to him, but I’m not. Maybe you will. And trust me; it will be a good thing if you are. He trusts you, likes you as a friend, and maybe when he’ll see you in sexy mode, he’ll fall for you.”

 She looked impressed. Yes! Well begun is half done.

 “C’mon Martha. You know you can knock him off his feet! You’ve got that perfect model type body and lovely blue eyes that’ll match his. And you’re blond hair is a bonus, since he usually goes for blondes.”

 “Hey! Don’t insult me.” She scowled.

 “Okay, but please Martha, just think. If for once you attend a proper party without the fancy-dress part, that is, you actually wear proper party clothes you’ll look stunning! People won’t peg you as The Joker, or The Queen of Underworld, or The Tooth fairy, or whoever you decided to dress up as that night. You’ll be just you, the beautiful girl in that dress, or the gorgeous girl with that smile, or the stunning girl in those heels, or—”

 “The amazing girl who puked on Kayla.”

 Uh oh. Not good.

 So not good.

 “I’ll shut up.”

 “You better.” Silence.

 For a nerd, she sure takes a lot of time to think.

 “I’ll do it.”

 I let out a war cry and launched myself at Martha, and gave her a huge hug. She was the best-est friend I ever had!