Shoot The Jerk

Chapter 1: Walking Pink Fairytale Disaster in That Fab Tux.

Walking Pink Fairytale Disaster in That Fab Tux.

CHAPTER  1

Kayla

“In your dreams, bro. I’m definitely not wearing that to your wedding.” I said to James on his wedding day. It was going to be the second most perfect wedding of the century. The first one, of course, was my parents’.

Or at least mother says so.

Personally, I think she bribed the wedding photographer to not include any embarrassing moments, since I could not imagine my mother doing anything, apart from making the tastiest food, without mucking it up.

Last year, she insisted on revamping the living room (only because I wouldn’t let her touch my bedroom), which is why its walls are a sickly yellow shade. And the couch is pink with a floral pattern. Oh wait, or were those the curtains?

Needless to say, all parties now took place at Martha’s place. Martha’s dad, my godfather was pretty cool, and did not go into hypertension every time he saw a beer bottle.

Mother believed that I put up with her because I love her, but believe me, without her culinary skills, all the love in the world wouldn’t have kept me from strangling her when she suggested that I wear that frilly blue dress for James’ wedding.

As if the blue frills weren’t bad enough, James was holding up a hazardous combination of frills and pink that looked threatening to my bad-ass image. Everyone was going to laugh at me. I groaned silently. The groan intensified and became quite audible as James held up a wreath of pink roses that was somehow supposed to adorn my hair without looking ridiculous.

Or maybe the whole point was to make me look ridiculous.

“Come on, I’m getting married! It’s just for one day, and it’s not exactly ugly, you know. In fact, it’s quite pretty. You’ll look great.”

He dumped the dress on my bed, but gently placed the flowers on the dressing table. I bet his courtship with Cindy had taught him the value of roses. I snorted unattractively.

“It’s easy for you to say that. You're not going to look like a walking pink fairytale disaster in that fab tux. Cindy is going to swoon when she sees you.”

He had the grace to look embarrassed, though only for a moment. Then the cocky smartass James I knew was back as he declared that he was going to sweep Cindy off her feet, so she might as well make it easier for him.

“By fainting? Wouldn’t that make her a dead weight?”

He ignored me.

“Get ready quickly and go help Cindy. She looked quite frazzled the other day. God, I hope she doesn’t change her mind!”

His ranting gave a whole new meaning to the term pre-wedding jitters, so I assured him that I would do as he said and manoeuvred him out of my room. As if Cindy would change her mind. She loved him too much, and that’s not even considering the scandal it would cause.

Then, I quickly discarded the blue frilly dress, which was starting to look appealing, and put on the pink frilly dress. It’s not that I dreaded wearing it; I just knew that I wouldn’t be able to pull off the princess look.

I swept up my hair in a messy pony tail, stuffed my makeup in my bag pack along with my purse and wreath of roses and dashed down the stairs and out the house through the back door. I found the opening in the fence which Cindy and James used to sneak through and rushed in our neighbour’s house through their back door.