Barking Mad (Sirius/OC)

Put my name at the top of your list

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Chapter 18

This is the last time I'm asking you this,

Put my name at the top of your list 

The Last Time - Taylor Swift ft. Gary Lightbody

I opened the huge infirmary doors and was greeted by four smiling faces. Well, okay. I would have liked them to have been smiling. It certainly would have looked a lot more charming than the frowns they were currently wearing.

"Hi lads," I greeted somewhat awkwardly, wondering if it was even possible for the ground to swallow one whole. Where there is smoke, there's fire, right? Muggles had to have come up with it from somewhere. So if the ground can swallow someone, I know a ready candidate to try it out on.

"Hi love," Sirius said with a smile that made my heart beat violently against my ribs.

I had no idea why I wasn't used to hearing his voice or seeing his eyes on me yet. We had been hanging out for several weeks now and still... Every time I heard his voice I was ready for him to take me against the wall. Right then. Right there.

Not that that was going to happen, but it was a fun fantasy to have before I fell asleep. I had always thought it strange how people imagined the things they wanted to happen in their life before falling asleep. When I had asked my mother about this, she had laughed delightedly. According to her, those fantasies were wishes sent into the otherworld where fairies would pluck them when they had ripened enough.

Fairies were guarding my fate.

I used to like the sentiment as a little girl, but when I looked at Sirius now I knew that my wish would never be ripe enough to be cashed in for this. He might not be perfect, but he was my version of perfection and the thought of ever having him, of ever knowing him intimately (emotionally and physically) was something my brain just couldn't comprehend.

Then again I just didn't want my wish to ripen enough for Sirius Black. I wished him better luck in life than what he'd receive with me. He wouldn't hit the - how do Muggles say it? - jackpot with me at all.

I finally tore my eyes away from Sirius, realizing all too well that his eyes hadn't left mine for an instant either. The thought warmed me, against my better judgment. I smiled at the other boys and politely asked how they were.

"Don't mind that," James said with a frown. "How are you feeling?"

Upon hearing his voice, I started to recall a weird scene from last night. "James Potter, did you tell me yesterday that I wouldn't be able to walk if you had tired me out?" I felt my cheeks redden, but my diversion tactic had worked perfectly.

The Marauders started laughing and hooting. Sirius teased that James wasn't man enough for the task, whereas Peter laughed that Lily would have his head if he even tried to do so.

Remus was oddly quiet through it all. I wanted to ask him if he was feeling quite alright, but the green colour of his skin told me enough. It may also have been quite cowardly of me to not want to bring the subject back to anything health related, but I doubted Remus would have told me anyway.

Now I was pathetic, crazy and a coward. Some Gryffindor I was.

The boys walked me back to the Common Room to fetch my books, a change of clothes and a quick shower. After I had done all of that, they accompanied me to the Great Hall. My stomach was growling something fierce, which made Sirius' eyes twinkle.