The Fifth

Delphi

The only sound in the room is my pencil scratching. The stillness and silence is nerve-wracking. Most of the questions are what I expected them to be. Measuring my ability to manipulate, process and interpret information. Testing my memory. My practical intelligence. Just like they told me it would.
Each packet is labeled something different.

Problem Solving
Critical Thinking
Spatial Intelligence
Logic
Long-Term Memory

Occasionally a question throws me off, like this one:

Of all timepieces, or devices that measure time, the ancient sundial has the least amount of moving parts. Which timepiece has the most?

I ponder it for a few minutes. Knowing I'll be wrong anyway, I write human beings. Which is actually arguably true, but I don't think that that's what they meant. Then again, they must have made it short-answer for a reason. To see how our minds work. And that is the way my mind works.
I wonder how much time I have left.
I chance a quick look up at the mirror every few minutes, frequently looking up, wondering who is watching me. My reflection looks very small in the blank white room. My mind wanders for a moment, then I force it back to the Exam.
Occasionally, I feel It rising up in me. It is the thing that holds me back. But I can't let it do that now.
It's so difficult to manage. It's like magma building up in a volcano, smooth but deliberate. With every question I can't answer, I feel my stomach heating up and turning the molten rock. If I don't manage it, I will explode. And depending on how long I hold in the magma, it can amount to a huge panic attack. They tried to give me pills for the panic along with the focus ones, but it doesn't stop it entirely. And I'm feeling it start to churn.
No. Not now. Not while they're watching me. I have to appear stronger than I am.
I look back up at them. Then I force my head down. How unfocused I must look!
I think of Willow. I didn't get to see which room she went into. She could be right next to me. Some of the questions I don't feel good about I know she will.
I know she will. She's probably found the most logical and efficient way to get through the questions. She's the smart one.
Then I try to reassure myself.
No no no, don't think of that. You'll pass. You are very smart.
I'm very smart I'm very smart I'm very-
No. No I'm not.
I need to stop thinking like this. I'll explode. In front of all of them. I must keep it in.
And keep it in, I do. I shut out the voices in my head and keep working. I can't let them watch me struggle. It must look effortless. I am not weak. I am not weak. I am not weak.
I move through the questions as quickly as I can, and try not to look at how much I have left to do.
I do Spatial Intelligence first. That way I can get my worst subjects done. After that, I can zip through questions.
I do Critical Thinking soon after.
The last two are pretty easy compared to the first two, and Long-Term Memory is right in the middle. So I move a lot faster after my third packet, also reassured that the questions are getting easier. Problem Solving is actually harder than Long-Term Memory, in my opinion, so my self-awareness needs a little work.
The last packet is Logic.
That is my fastest packet by far. When I get to the last question, I can't believe it. I got through the whole thing without panicking. And I still have a pencil left! I toss it up into the air in celebration and it hits the ceiling.
I feel my face flush, I make a gesture of apology at the surely giggling officials, and then I feel my body relax. I actually really don't care whether they laugh or not. I'm done.
I lift up my packet to check my answers, and then I notice there is one more page to Logic. That's embarrassing. Oh, well. My life will continue.
But it isn't apart of the logic packet. It's a whole other subject.
But this one is entitled, Political Views.
That's odd. My teachers never prepped us for this one. This has me instantly worried.
But there is only one question.
"What is power, and how should it be managed?"
Huh. Okay. I sit back in my chair and think.
Power is destructive. Which is what makes it so fragile and desired. Power is what writes out our life. Everything is connected to it. And human beings have a need for it.
It is an illusion of happiness and prosperity. Humans yearn for it, and yet when they have it they are unhappy. And eventually the desire corrupts them. It is a trap.
Too much power is, anyway. A little bit, if maintained and in balance, keeps a society together. If no power ever existed in any way, shape or form, humanity would be lost.
It can be maintained conservatively in balance. Too much of anything is dangerous. And absolute power is deadly.

I write it all down, and just when I write the period to finish my last sentence, an official walks in. She has a mass of dark curls that spiral down over her shoulders, and her skin is a golden-brown. She gives me a smile, and I can tell it's genuine.
"Did you finish?"
"Yes. I'm honestly so relieved." I give a small chuckle. It's always good to make friends. Especially here.
"You can leave your papers here. Right this way," she says, holding the door open and smiling.
I glance at her hand. It's a silver wedding band with the date of last week inscribed on it.
"Congratulations," I gesture to her ring.
"Thank you!" She smiles even wider. I decide I like her. Even if she is a bit bubbly.
She takes my hand and power-walks me out. I refuse to look back at my test because I will totally overthink everything I wrote if I pay too much attention to it.

I wonder if I passed. And, if I do, what the Fifth will bring.