Loving You Is Forbidden (Third Book of "Fire and Ice" series)

CH. 9 (2): One step forward, two steps back

Dear all,

as promised here is the new chapter! I won't add much, just thank you very much for your support and sweetness: your messages are incredible!

I will let you enjoy the chapter and comment something at the end, in my usual Author's chit-chat section, pulling some questions out :-)

Now, let me say it is dedicated to all of you, to some of my dearest friends that never left me and I want to particularly dedicate this chapter to LadyDianna as a sincere thank you for your messages and words of that day! xox

The wonderful banner was created for me by the amazing Maria231000, thank you!

Btw, feeling artistic? Then I would love new banners! And Tolya would love them, too.

Music from Blink 182, I miss you, as it felt like fitting this chapter.

I will be looking forward to reading your comments and messages!

Now, no more indulging in words.

Enjoy the chapter!

-OLEG POV-

"Fear is often greater than the danger itself", from Junjou Romantica, episode 4 season 1.

My eyes opened up at the usual time and the room was still immersed in the dark light of the early morning. It was five and thirty minutes and there was no need for an alarm to wake me up, for I had been used to early mornings for over half of my life and however, it was a trait I inherited from my grandmother, who would wake up every morning at five sharp without failing a single day. Sometimes it was earlier and that was in summer, but she needed no alarm that however did not exist in their first very simple and humble house, and no rooster, for I believe she was the one giving it the signal to sing at the first lights of the day. My mind lingered on that distant memory a short while and took me back to time when I was a very young child, loving to wake up before anyone else aside my grandmother and find a moment of peace.

Those early mornings, those early hours where I helped my grandmother with whatever she needed, were rarely moments of peace and quiet. Peace and quiet before he would wake up, angry, disorientated and in search for a new bottle to drink him off completely. Peace and quiet before hell would break in that simple and humble house. I grew up in a very remote and simple village of Northern Siberia and we all remembered and experienced the cause of that war in Afghanistan in a way or another.

It was raining outside and the drops of water quietly tapped to the window of Anatoly' room. As the distant memories of my past regressed to their usual hidden and back space of my mind, not being of necessary importance, I silently stirred my body and stretched my arms and back. I kept a few seconds on that armchair making sure he was sleeping sound and deep, and I realized nothing would have woken him up. Anatoly was deeply asleep and probably entirely sprawled in the middle of bed having tossed arms and legs in every direction. I believe it was his usual way of sleeping and my lips curved in a soft smile, as I remembered the way he was when I woke up the other day. My legs pushed me up and silently I took a few steps stopping at his side. So it was correct and he was indeed sleeping in the middle of the bed just like I thought. Another smile formed and hence a silent sigh left my mouth.

I realized that Anatoly somehow was probably the only person breathing on this world able to pull such emotions and reactions from me. A simple and very spontaneous smile that I had forgotten I was capable of.

Probably the only person?

I shook my head knowing the answer too well. There was no room for "probably" in my sentence.