Perennial Rose | {Levi x OC} | Shingeki no Kyojin |

Chapter 34: Our Paths

Ilyse and the rest of my squad all have different paths behind them. Now, they all have winded to this point of intersection, with mine also included in this junction. I don't know what to think of this. Especially because I have some control over what their future will bring them. My prospective decisions will either alter their future drastically, or allow them to proceed with ease.

I stand up from my chair and stretch my arms, pulling on the stiff muscles of my back. I then walk to the back of the room and open the shutters of the lone window. A cool breeze rushes inside as it blows the hair out of my face.

Dark clouds hide the night sky, making the land mysteriously obscure. Without the comforting light from the moon and spots of stars, it's like I'm looking at a never-ending sea of blackness that is just waiting to pull me into its empty depths.

As I bring my elbow to the edge, I unknowingly scratch my hand against the rough surface of the improperly sanded wooden frame. I examine the affected skin, noticing its rose color from the abrasion.

I sigh, which is something that I have been doing too much of these days.

It's the same color that manifested Levi's blushing cheeks the night from one week ago.

This was definitely a surprise to me. A cold, stoic man with rosy cheeks of embarrassment is a baffling scene. I've come to understand his way of doing this, however. I myself have blushed after he had led me down the stairs during that painful night. His gentlemanliness had warmed me to such an extent, and I believe that maybe, just maybe, my delicate act had the same effect on him.

Nevertheless, I can never read him. I never know what he is thinking.

I sigh again, sending my warm breath into the cold air.

All this thought about peoples' pasts and this sudden reminder of Levi's illegible nature has made me curious.

What is his past like?

What kind of path has he taken to get here?

I have worked with him for several months and I don't even know the answer to these questions. I do know that I won't be given the answers right away.

What if his past is filled with traumatizing memories that he doesn't want to recall? Are these memories the source of the shadow that remains in his eyes?

I want to know.

Just as I have been wanting to do for my fellow troops, I want to heal him. He has given me so much, yet I have repayed so little. If I could just purify him of the clouds that gloom over him, maybe it will suffice to liquidate the debt that I owe him.

If that is the case, then I must know of the source of the clouds. The origin of this turbulence must be locked in his uncertain past. I want to unlock this chest and kill every one of the shadowy monsters that have filled him with their chaos.

Somehow.

I don't know how.

"Squad Leader Renata!"

I turn around and find Luki popping his head into the room. His chestnut bangs are cleanly swept to the side and he looks at me with sparks in his eyes: a sign indicating that he is hungry.

"We're ready for supper," He says.

"You must be starving," I respond as I walk across the room to the door, "I'll give you my potatoes, don't worry."

Luki makes a triumphant smile. I ruffle his hair as we make our way down the hallway.

/~・~/

A small piece of wood delicately carved into the soft petals of a rose. Its bumps and grooves feel soothing against my fingertips and I often find myself rubbing its surface between my index finger and thumb. I hold it up to the clouded sky as the pendant's string around my neck restrains me from raising it up any further.