December 4th

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The next morning, I decided to show Chen some of our old appearances on certain shows. "My... Name... Is... Kim... Jongdae..." Chen said slowly. He was watching Weekly Idol where we were promoting our song, wolf. He smiled when he saw himself troll the mc with his fluent Korean. I was glad he was okay, he didn't say a word or have any emotion showing on his face the whole day yesterday. Suho and a few others asked me why too. I later found out from Baekhyun that he was depressed seeing me cry so much in front of him. I finally decided make a promise to myself to not cry again.

Chen laughed again when he saw himself using his lightning powers. He... Finally... Laughed. I found myself wiping my tears seeing him laugh. I miss his laugh, his troll moments, everything. As he started watching Happy Camp, I walked off to my room before I could break down again in front of him again...

I can't continue to be like this... Crying over every little thing... I need to be strong... Fighting, Xiumin, fighting!

*I know, very short... I'm sorry*

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