ALL HAIL SPIRIT BEAR

A Day In The Park With Bae

Once upon a time in a land that's not so far away because it's this land right here below my feets.

I met a spirit bear.

He was walking through the park ever so gracefully.

I watched as he leaned out and swallowed little jimmy whole.

I sighed happily seeing as I hated little jimmy.

Spirit bear saw me.

And he stared

And he stared so hard

His stare was like a rock

Or Nicki Minajs booty.

He slowly crept over to me, I didn't dare move.

I let him approach me

I didn't want him to be scared

I loved him.

He nudged my face with his nose, I smiled and licked his face.

He quickly backed away and yelled "FUXK YOU BITCH THATS GROSS WHY YOU LICK ME!"

He pulled out a shotgun and shot me twice

I fell to the ground

He drank my blood

Then slowly as I felt the whole world fading away spirit bear once again began to fly into the sunlight

I watched as he did backflips as the sun carried him away

But before he was gone

Or before I bled out

He smile at me

And I saw his beautiful teeth

And then slowly

And softly

And calmly

He whispered

Just so only I could hear him

Just the words that would help me survive

"You aren't even my dad."

And I knew that was good because beastiality was bad enough incest would just make it worse.

And then he was gone

And apparently his words couldn't save me because then my gun wounds got worse and I died

But it was okay

Because I got my romantic walk in the park with Bae...

The end