invisible string | f. zhang

xix. topeka

nineteen. topeka

     A KNOCK STIRS MARIBELLE FROM her thoughts. She doesn't answer, but the knock comes again.

"Maribelle," Percy's voice calls out, "We're all going to meet for dinner in a few. Are you okay? Piper said you'd run out of Jason's cabin. I know that it was probably difficult for you—"

Maribelle puts her hands over her ears, tuning out the voice of the boy.

A louder, more rapid knock makes her drop her hands.

"Maribelle, it's me, open the door." At the sound of Frank's voice more tears begin to fall.

Not good enough. Not good enough for Gabe, not good enough for Jason, not good enough for Frank.

"Go away," She manages to say.

She hears muffled voices and then footsteps slowly leaving. The doorknob jiggles and then the door slowly opens. Maribelle glances up, "I said go—oh." She stops when she sees Hazel outside the door.

"Hey, Belle," Hazel smiles and steps inside, closing the door softly.

"Hey, Haze," Maribelle says, wiping her eyes, "I look a mess."

Hazel smiles, "That's okay, I heard you visited Jason?"

Maribelle feels more tears begin to fall, "Yeah."

"Piper said you ran out?"

"Yeah. I just couldn't—he was starting to wake up. And Piper had told me he remembered me."

"I'm sorry, Maribelle."

"But not the bad things I did," Maribelle continues, "He remembers all the good and I just . . . couldn't tell him that I'm not who he thinks I am. I miss him so much, he was one of my closest friends. I loved him."

Not enough. Not enough.

Hazel takes a seat beside Maribelle, taking her hand in hers, "It'll be alright, Belle."

"I can't be on this quest," Maribelle says softly, "I'm a mess, I can't even face Jason."

"Percy wants you on this quest for a reason, Belle, don't doubt him."

"Thanks, Haze," Maribelle says and leans down to rest her head on the girls shoulder.

"Frank's really worried," Hazel tells her after a few seconds, "He's still waiting outside, but I told him if he eavesdropped I'd beat him up."

Maribelle giggles.

"He really cares about you," Hazel says.

Maribelle smiles to herself.

"He's too good for me," Maribelle tells Hazel. "And I just—I know he's nothing like him, but I can't stop comparing the two. It's only a matter of time before I mess something up, I'm selfish and I'd do anything for just a taste of love and power. That's what got me in this mess in the first place. Gabe loved me, or I thought he did and I was so young and he was older and so cool, and he only saw me. So, I did anything to keep him happy, keep him focused on me."

Hazel doesn't say anything for a moment, and Maribelle looks up at her. "I think," Hazel speaks, Maribelle feels bad for dumping all of this on her. She was barely fifteen (though she had been dead for nearly seventy years). "I think, maybe you need to just forget Gabe."

Maribelle scoffs.

"I know how that sounds," Hazel says, "You just have to burn those bridges. Talk it out with Jason, I don't know how you'll talk to Gabe, I'm not really a 'communing with the dead' girl, but I know Nico can. You just have to find a way to move on—I know it can be hard, but once you let it go, it'll be better. For you and for Frank. He doesn't deserve you pushing him away because you don't think you're good enough for him. Because, Belle, you're great, okay? And I know we aren't as close as you and Percy, or you and Frank, but you brought more to the table than just fashion. You're a good fighter when you aren't scared of breaking a nail—"