Paradoxcicle

Overflow

"No," Ms Gilbert told him sternly, but after doing so took another look at Big Duck, "maybe. But no, I only intended to make this for taking attendance. It's a nightmare losing kids on school trips, let me tell you."

"I'll take your word," Chad could see the exhaustion in Ms Gilbert's eyes just by mentioning kids going missing.

"You've got my interest, Big Duck," Mr Perfect stepped forward, "take us to see this so-called green gold."

"Oh, a man of business, are we?" Big Duck grinned at Mr Perfect, "let's get goin' then! Can't let anyone else stumble on this find while we're talkin'!"

Big Duck lead them down the street and through a few twists and turns, ending up in quite quiet areas of the city, if this even counted as being in the city anymore. It was almost like they were the first people to walk through in days, it was hard to believe this had been the discovery site of some precious mineral- at least, that's all they could assume Big Duck was leading them to. They didn't have much evidence to go off.

Eventually Big Duck walked around one last corner and threw his arms wide to present what they'd all been waiting for; sitting before them, a massive pile of green slime, taller than the tallest member of their group.

"She's a beaut, alright!" Big Duck nodded, mostly to himself since everyone else was stood looking at the thing before them in shock, "think she was callin' herself Slusan when I found her earlier. No goddamn clue when green gold started talkin', or when it stopped bein' an unstoppable lethal cloud o' gas, but I'm sure the money's gonna keep talkin' all the same!"

Br'aad started walking forwards with a hand outstretched to touch Slusan. Mark Thompson tugged him back with a disapproving look.

"And you're gonna...sell this?" Chad asked through a grimace, trying not to imagine how this was going to work because none of the options were at all appealing.

"This is the jackpot people dream of, friend!" Big Duck patted Chad on the shoulder, who awkwardly stepped out of it.

"This can't be...I thought we'd gotten rid of you for good, Fartbo!" Ms Gilbert pointed her finger accusingly at the slime.

"Who the fuck is Fa-" Chad turned and looked at Ms Gilbert, who was holding something that looked suspiciously like a handful of five grenades, "-aaAAAH oh my god Ms G, why do you have those?"

Her eyes stayed trained on Slusan, "for cases just like this. I'll be finishing the job here."

"Um, not that I'm an expert or anything," Romeo jumped in, "but I don't think you're supposed to be using those in close quarters combat. You see, we did a play of War Rat, and-"

"Cover your nose!" Ms Gilbert shouted and tossed them at the slime.

"Aren't you meant to cover your ears-? Wait, WAIT-" Chad took too long to realise what was happening as by the time he'd raised his hands near his face he could hear the booms of explosions, and then a lot of wet, slimy noises as green viscera burst out onto every surface and started dripping back down to the ground. Every surface including him, and the rest of their group.

When he next looked at Ms Gilbert she already had her hands on her hips, ignoring how her glasses were completely coated in slime. Then she sniffed the air twice, "hm. Well maybe that wasn't Fartbo, then. Better to be safe than sorry with threats like that."

"I'm sorry, safe?" Chad gawked at her, "did you forget the part with the five grenades?!"

"They weren't proper grenades," Ms Gilbert told him and pointed to where she'd thrown them. When Chad looked he saw some confetti falling down on the completely eviscerated body of Slusan.

"Safe for bystanders, pack a fun punch for the target!" Ms Gilbert continued explaining.

"Yeah, I'm sure Slusan found that very fun," Chad continued to criticise Ms Gilbert's choice of words.

Slarf was quick to get himself clean, shaking the slime off his body and sending more little pieces onto everyone surrounding him, which Chad didn't appreciate. Mr Perfect, meanwhile, had somehow perfectly avoided all of the blast and remained spotless. He then tried to claim that having a good work-life balance was the reason. Everyone was too busy being jealous of him to believe him.

"Alright. Well, that was fun, I guess," Br'aad shrugged.

"Wha- but- my-" Big Duck was just staring at where Slusan used to be, devastated.

"Hey, not everyone wins in business," Mr Perfect approached him with a reassuring tone, "but you can't let the business win over you."

Big Duck looked inspired for a moment, but then thought the words over in his head, "well that just don't make no sense then."

Mr Perfect seemed to ignore that and walked away proudly as though his work was done.

Not wanting the group to be broken up, everyone else started to follow with those already leaving and going back towards the main streets. Ms Gilbert sighed and took Big Duck's arm to lead him along.

"Come on, I'm sure you didn't need that anyway. We still might have no idea what this green gold stuff is, but I think maybe you're better off finding a different trade to get involved in. I'm happy to give some career advice if you're unsure about your next steps!" she offered.

"Um...yeah, I'll...I'll think about it," Big Duck sounded non-commital, but followed anyway, having not much left that he could do with the remains of Slusan.

They made small conversation as they continued their journey, finding it difficult to find topics they had in common to discuss with it being such a varied group. Mr Perfect and Big Duck seemed to have some things to discuss in relation to business and money, although in all other respects they seemed to be the two most polar opposites in the group. Ironically he wouldn't have had much to say to Chad, and the two were still weirdly identical in facial looks.

Even the theatre kid and literal wolf looked like they were getting on with each other. At this point Chad had no idea who the hell they were gonna recruit next.

It wasn't long before he found out, though- because the next ones came running at him.

"Charlie? No, damn it, you're not- ugh," the stranger immediately started addressing Chad, but must have realised he had the wrong guy and put his head in his hands.

"I mean, I used to go by Charles," Chad offered, but that didn't appear to help the other person's mood. There were a few others with him, too. Was he building a group of his own like Ms G?

Two of them did look weirdly familiar, in the same way Big Duck did. Either Chad had some weird extended family, or there was something going on here.

Wait...Chad squinted at the one who'd talked to him. They didn't look like a reflection of himself, but he was still somehow familiar.

"Well, we might not be who you're here for, but could you at least give us your names?" Ms Gilbert asked.

"I- yeah, sure, I guess. I dunno if any of you would know me, but I'm Ranboo. And maybe, if you're willing, we might need your help."