If This Isn't Love

Chapter 3: Breaking Point

"Yo ? Can you please tell me your name ?" He says , looking down at me. His eyes twinkling like the North Star. His smile could move the waves of this world, like the moon, if he wanted to. He seemed like a sweetheart, a warm gift from above - "Are you going to answer me ?" He cuts me off of my poetic thoughts. I hope he didn't notice that I was staring at him. "Miya" I say, quick and dry. "Miya.." He says with a slight smirk. I soon notice that we are walking into the Johnston's. The most expensive hotel around . I look up at him, my eyes bucked.  "How in the hell is he going to pay for this?" I think to myself. He glances down & laughs, "I got you". Did he just read my damn thoughts ? I'm looking around now. There's glass tables, leather couches, and more expensive looking shit in the lobby. He sits me in a chair and whispers in my ear, "Don't move. I'll be right back." He soon comes back with a key in his hand, picks me up once more , and proceeds to the elevator. Man, I just hope he doesn't try and rape me ... I won't let it happen. Not this time . Not this damn time. I jumped out of my thoughts and realized we were in the room . He let me down . My socks are soaking wet. Ew. It feels so nasty , so I just stand in one spot, looking around. I must admit, this was one nice condo. "Are you okay?" He asks me, holding my hands. I just look at him . His eyes are still twinkling . "Okay . Don't answer me !" He picks me up and carries me to the bed. "Please don't rape me..." I whisper. He looked up at me. His eyes changed to a blue color. "What ?" He asks. I can't believe I just said that. What the hell Miya... You're one dumb chick. I just slowly scoot away from him. "Did you say please don't rape you? Is that why you ran away ? From home ? Because you were raped ?" I don't answer him . He was on target . Right on target . I feel embarrassed. My eyes were getting heavy , not because I was exhausted , because I was about to break down and cry . Like a bitch . One tear fell . Then another , another , and another . Damn Miya ! "What's wrong ?" Never ask a girl what's wrong when she's on the verge of crying, that'll make her really break down . So, that's what I did . I broke . After years of being mistreated and cussed at by my mother , after years of 'almost' being raped , after years of being strong ...... I broke . Like a bitch . I broke down in front of a guy I didn't even know. He grabbed me and held me in his arms . Tighter than the first time. He was holding me ... I can't stop crying . I could tell I was leaving evidence on his tight-fitted white shirt... He didn't seem to care. He ran his hands through my hair, rocking me like a baby . As I cried and cried like one. "My names Kendrick, KJ for short.... I grew up in Queens but moved here a couple of years ago . My father ? Never met his bitch ass , but word is he died three years ago . My mother ? She's currently in rehab. That's the lady of my life, the closest thing to me. I love her and I miss her. Haven't seen her in a year . They told me she'll be out in August . That's six months from now. I guess that's why I have a soft place in my heart for women , because of my mother." I stopped crying , instantly. I looked up at him , at his eyes ... They were a beautiful green color now. I felt bad for him. I freed my arms from his grip and wrapped them around him, pulling him closer to me. Wanted him to know that he's not the only person in Brooklyn who's hurting ......

I nodded off to sleep .. I could feel him placing me into the bed. For some strange reason, I was hoping that I would feel movement in the bed signaling that he's laying next to me... but I didn't. I wanted him to hold me , again.