Music Sheet (Harry Styles)

Chapter 49 ~ Harry

Chapter 49 ~ Harry

Three weeks have past and it still hurts, but I don’t feel like dying every second now. When I’m around people, I can actually forget about it and just carry on. It’s when I’m alone, before I fall asleep, when the memories haunt me. But I’ll be fine, I have loads of things to keep me distracted. Tour starts in a month and a half and we’re rehearsing a lot. We are shooting our third video to release it before we take off with the tour around Europe. We have a lot of interviews and photoshoot sessions, a lot of promo and a few minor gigs. I’m working so hard so I don’t have time to think of her.

I try not to say her name… it’s easier that way. Less painful.

The lads and the girls know I’m doing better, yet I still catch them staring at me with worried expressions, but I smile at hem honestly, letting them know I’ll be fine. I’m not the first one to go through this and certainly I won’t be the first. If other can do it, so can I. maybe one day I’ll meet someone else and I’ll fall in love again, I’m pretty sure I won’t fall this hard ever again, but I’ll be in love again and I’ll be happy. For now, I don’t need anyone else. I’m better off alone.

Moni and Mila are not afraid to let me alone anymore. Louis asks me to go out with him and I go, I have fun and I don’t remember a thing the next morning. I laugh with the lads and if I remember her, I force myself to push that thought aside until I’m alone and I can mourn my lost. I’m doing my best to move on and I know everything will be fine at least.

When the whole Jennifer’s story came out, many people attacked me on the social networks. I lost around three million followers in one day and I didn’t mind, I wasn’t even surprised that so many people believed that woman and I didn’t even bother to deny it nor confirm it. I just let it be, hoping that the lie would fall by its own weight. And it did. A few days ago Jennifer husband made an appearance and told everyone that he didn’t left her because of me but because she couldn’t stop lying. Turns out Jennifer Jones is an actress and she needed fame, she needed to be recognised for her career to bust, and she could only think of lying to do so. When she told that to her husband, he left her, disgusted for the extents she could reach.

So the truth came out publicly, she apologised to me and so did many other gossip shows and tabloids. And let’s no talk about the fans. Because in a matter of hours all those millions of fans that unfollowed me, came back claiming they always loved me and they were sorry. I still say nothing about it, I pretend it never happened.

And with that solved, I’ve felt a bit better. I think everyone feels a bit better, now we can go out and no one starts yelling at me home wrecker or manwhore, which is always nice.

I’m sure that by when the tour finally starts, everything will be fine and I’ll enjoy every single moment I spend on stage, doing what I love the most. Maybe I’ll even end up forgetting about her, though there’s still a small part of me that whispers I’ll never forget about her. Not really, at least. But I ignore that voice, I don’t need it.

I’ve noticed the girls go out a lot together. Alex, Phebs, Belle, Mila, Moni and sometimes even with Kay. The other day only they went to a gig of this new girl band –Prodigy, I think it’s the name– and even if one of us wanted to go with them, they didn’t allow it. They said it was a night girls out. Since then, this band became one of Alex, Moni, Mila and Kay’s favourite. They couldn’t stop talking about how amazing they are for two days in a row.

Yes, they are still talking about this gig. It’s kind of funny, Mila seems infatuated with the bass player  and lead singer –I can’t remember their name–, Moni adores the lead singer too and Alex thinks the lead guitar is a genius. Apparently, Kay adores the drummer.