Pan's Tiger

Chapter 14: The most loyal Lost Boy

'Where are we going, Peter?' I asked cautiously.

'Back to camp.' He said sternly and honestly. I was reassured that we were travelling to somewhere familiar, but part of me realised that this familiar place was also extremely dangerous, for if there was no reason for me to want to escape, Pan wouldn't have taken me by the hand.

'Ok.'

As we approached camp, I began to smile. The walk, unlike the flight, was peaceful and comfortably silent, thus giving us the opportunity to think. Neverland truly was beautiful, even if I hadn't appreciated it yet. The trees, the forest, the animals, the undergrowth, but most of all, the magic. The place fuelled my soul with the intense power of magic from everything. I felt, as I had never done before, that I belonged somewhere.

'Lost Boys, I have some news,' Peter said sternly and powerfully, but also with a hint of excitement. All eyes turned towards us, most of the Lost Boys were still worrying about the disappearance of their prisoner. Our fingers still entwined in controlling happiness. 'Tiger Lily will now be our mother.' He announced.

My jaw dropped. I stared at Peter in awe and confusion.

Mother?

Mother to these children?

Mother to the Lost Boys? How? Why?

I had been an awful mother since I first had Rumple at quite a young age. But now Pan was proposing I relive the memory of my failed attempt at bringing up children with any level of responsibility. In addition, I knew more than this. I realised that Pan was trying to make me forget everything; he was telling me to forget our son and start again, as if nothing ever happened. I wouldn't forget. I couldn't forget how my son died. I cringed at the memory.

'What?!' I spluttered, ignoring the boys who were pounding me with intense questions of confusion, gratitude and happiness. I turned sharply back to Pan, continuing in a hushed whisper so only he could hear above their cheers, 'I can't be their mother. I don't know how. I failed with our child and I'll fail again.'

'Of course you can, Tiger. You just have to believe in yourself.' He teased and I glowered, annoyed by his cocky arrogance. 'If you hadn't left your son, he'd have grown to be a very powerful man.'

His words were only meant to be heard by me, but something about them made me shiver. There was a suggestive edge to them, like he knew something I didn't. It sickened me that his first thought wasn't honourable or kind or selfless; all Pan wanted was for our only son to be powerful.

'Alright then, Pan, who is their Father?' I demanded, smirking at my intelligence. But Peter seemed unfazed by me question, as if he had figured it out already.

'Me.' He said bluntly and now I had another reason for my jaw to drop.

'You?' I raised a mocking eyebrow and studied him from head to toe, failing to make him uncomfortable. 'But you're just a boy. Your too immature to have any responsibilities of children. Let's just remember your record, shall we? Our son is dead.' I seethed.

'I'm older than I look, remember? Besides, Kitten, I know more about the upbringing of children than you think,' He spat back, almost angrily. 'I looked after Rumple since the day you left. If you were still around, he'd have been fine.'

'Sure, our son would be fine.' I rolled my eyes. 'You couldn't be a suitable Father figure for these boys. But neither could I be a suitable mother to them. I have no proper knowledge and no success. We all know I am not their real mother, Pan, so there is absolutely no point in pretending otherwise.'

'Oh really?' Peter mused. 'You see you're quite young, Tiger Lily, but you're almost a woman. Almost a woman.' He repeated mockingly, taking his time to look across my body mischievously, reminding me of what I had stupidly lost to be with him: my son and the only memory I had of him, my adulthood. 'But you act like one, you are so sensible and intelligent that the responsibility of children will be easy for you, again.'