In The Arms Of Danger [Sequel to Make You Mine]

22:

During my time at home I gave more thought to the care and concern of my son, rather than the thought of being victimized. But then I'd step outside to go grocery shopping, or pick Danny up from Pre-K, only to be reminded that I was- or still am a victim. And that nothing, not even counseling or some miraculous cure was going to change that.

I had given up on being the same person I was before. I gave up on finding myself again. I didn't recognize the girl in the mirror anymore. I hated looking in mirrors now.

I was still afraid to go out past dark. I bolted down every single window and door every night, and the only way I could sleep was because of exhaustion from staying up the previous night. I was grateful for the sleep I did get; even if it lasted three hours.

I remember the days after. The days when I had to get up and go outside despite being too afraid to even go near the windows. The days after Jared deployed were some of the hardest days.

Those were the days that kept reminding me of how sad I truly was. Because for one thing, I was scared shitless of everything. From a squirrel rustling in the bushes to an ambulances' blaring sirens.  

For the two years during Jared's deployment, Danny and I spent our days inside. Constantly in fear of Ian breaking out and coming to get us.

I do remember though; a few times I'd step outside just to turn right back around. Only to wish I could just hide in my room instead of going to the park or whatever was planned for that day. I remember Danny and Blaze coming to my aide a few times. He was too young to understand but he knew enough to comfort me. I tried not to let it show. I tried so hard not to let his sea green eyes, small pink lips, and sandy blond hair get me worked up. But I couldn't help it. Every time I look  at Daniel Christopher Campbell all I see is Ian Lucas Hunt. And that not only scares me, it scares them too. Both of them.   

"Candy, candy, candy!" Danny exclaims while I lift him from his car seat.

Every time we enter the store he wants to touch and take things that don't belong to him. Sighing heavily, I pick him up and place him on my hip.

"We're here to get a few things for tonight. Not candy," I reiterate before kissing his plump cheek.

He shakes his head while wrinkling his nose. "But daddy let's me eat candy," he pouts sadly.

"He's just trying to win you over." I mumble to myself.

If there was anything Ian could do to get Danny's approval he would. Even if that meant buying candy until his teeth rots, or toys that I constantly step on.

"Candy, candy, candy!" He bounces up and down eagerly which causes my stomach to twist even more. The rumbling inside of me increases and then I feel it. I feel the vomit rising.

Gently, I place him on his feet. He runs a few feet away from me which is strictly against our rules. But I don't have time to say anything because I'm suddenly huddled over, trying to keep the vomit down.

"Miss, are you alright?" A lady comes to my aid.

Breathe Ava, just breathe. I remind myself whilst drawing circles in my tummy. Even though I didn't puke, I make sure I thank the cashier for her help anyway. She bought a trashcan just in case.  

"Hey stop making mommy sick!" Danny warns in the cutest voice. It's child like and full of concern.

"I'm okay Munchkin. Your sister isn't doing anything wrong." I smile at him and he returns it. Once he grabs my hand I remember to reprimand him for what he did before.

"Don't run off from me. You wait with me before you go running off by yourself."

"But I came right back," he answers.