A God's Last Death

Broken Ribs Poke Our Lungs

"Home sweet home," Kai slumps on the sofa with a suggestive groan, stretching his legs over the coffee table. He closes his eyes and leans his head back on a pillow, while the moonlight showers through the windows and casts shadows on his face, too perfectly for my sake. As I caress his features with my eyes, I can't help but find his relaxed expression soothing. The way his hair falls over his eyes, and his chest calmly rises with each breath he takes, it's as if he has leapt out from a movie scene. But I wouldn't know anything about movies, would I? It's not like I have watched any.

"It's the second time I catch you staring," Kai's deep voice brings me back to reality.

Without saying anything, I tear my eyes off him and walk towards the window where Jenny sits. Her small snout is glued against the glass, and I instantly know she's onto something. "What is it, girl?" Her years perk up at the sounds of my voice, but she doesn't move. "Is there someone outside? Is it a bug? Is it? Tell me it's not a bug."

"Just leave the damn cat alone, Andrew. It'll be better for all of us," Kai grumbles like a child.

"Ignore him, Jenny. He's just jealous."

"I'll bite that sharp tongue of yours, and I'll make sure you'll like it."

You hear that? Yep, that flattering sound you hear is my heart, beating out of control. Why am I always taken completely off guard by his stupid taunts? On and on I go. I make myself go dizzy, feeling like a teenager again, self-conscious and awkward around him. I hate that feeling.

I raise my gaze to the full moon that is resting just above the empty condos across the street, and I would say that this is the only light I see in the dark midnight of my fate. I lose track of time. I don't notice the moon slowly disappear behind the buildings, or that Jenny has already jumped off the window, until I hear Kai from behind me.

"What's happening?"

I turn around and face him, and my brows knit in confusion once I see the state he is in. His face has settled into its lines of habitual coldness, but his eyes are nothing like before. They are those of a madman, empty, lost, constantly moving and searching for something beyond.

"Are you alright?" I gently ask and take a tentative step towards him.

"What am I doing?" he stands in the middle of the living room, like a fish out of its pond. I know he hasn't heard me because he suddenly turns his back on me and starts moving around the room. "Where is the bed? It's not here. Where is it? Where's the bed!" he yells at me, and I cower in fear.

I point to my room, and within seconds he is flying down the corridor with unprecedented agility. At first, I'm too surprised to move, but eventually I decide to follow him. What the hell has gone into him?

"I'm dizzy," I hear him stammer once I enter the room. "Oh, God. To sit, to breathe. Here it is, yes. The bed." He touches the edge of my bed, as if he is trying to make sure it's real. His body is so weak he ends up tumbling to the mattress with a groan. "My soul is slipping away. Oh, my soul, take courage. The storm will pass in a little while. We will not drown, yes, little by little my chest will calm down."

I approach the bed and kneel down on the floor, but I don't know what to do. He is so broken, curled into a ball and whimpering like a wounded dog, and seeing him like that makes my heart contract. Then and there, I gather the courage I need to reach out to him, and I bring out my hand to touch his shoulder.

Kai, sensing my touch, springs up from the mattress and seizes my wrist so aggressively I let out a gasp of surprise. "They started again," he roughly shakes me, like he is trying to wake me up from a bad dream. "Do you hear them? Yes, it's them. Do you hear them?" I shake my head, and my reaction immediately infuriates him. "They're here!" his eyes glisten in terror. "They dig the innards of the air. The wind blows through the blades of their wings; they uproot the light. Ragged rags, the light hangs from their nails. Please, please, I'm begging you! Show mercy!" he pleads, bending his head on my chest. I am about to open my mouth to speak, but he is already up again, frantically glancing around him. "Hell? Is this it? Tell me! I believe it; yes, this is it. It's growing, yes, it's growing, it's all burning in my soul. Look inside me. What do you see? Look at me! Look! Look where the pain grows! What do you see?" he points to his chest and remains still, helpless, like a rock waiting for the angry sea to crash into his bare chest, his eyes sunken in the abyss of despair.

And I do the first thing that comes to my mind: I hug him. I wrap my arms around his weak shoulders and hug him so tight, so that I chase his nightmares away and bring him back to reality. Kai is too helpless to resist. He surrenders to my touch and hooks his arms around my neck, quietly sobbing against my shirt. He is so brave and closed-off that I hadn't realised he is suffering inside. Maybe that's why he can't heal. Because he keeps pretending he isn't hurt.

In the gloomy silence of the room, the song of crying and heartbeat speaks. That's how I end up opening up to him, not caring about the aftermath it will bring. A detective, slowly falling for the criminal he was hired to catch.