Main characters never die?!

Chapter Seventeen - Little Universes

We were sitting on Eiran's cloak, his back against a huge tree and I sat in front of him. He held me so tightly that I felt he would never let me go. We didn't talk much for half an hour, we just settled down and felt each other's presence. I guess we needed time for it to sink in and feel real.

It was incredible that we found each other in another world after 15 years. Well, it must have been 19 years for him. I felt a little bad about it, but I was glad that I didn't have to wait that long.

„We should go back," I whispered, not to disturb the silence of the night.

„Not yet." I could feel him shaking his head.

„If they wake up, they get scared without us or think we are in trouble." I tried to persuade him.

„Not Aprudeé. She will think I'm trying to seduce you somewhere." His voice told me he was smiling.

„Eiran! She is just a child." I scolded him. It was strangely natural for me to talk to him so casually. As if nothing happened and we only saw each other yesterday. Well, yes we did, but not in this way.

„When you were her age, you did nothing but read romance novels. you know. She found one of her maids and has been threatening them ever since to tell our parents if they don't lend her more. Of course, she would never do that, and the maids know it too, but they just can't say no to her."

„And now we are in a romance novel I read." I sighed.

„Really? I thought about the possibility, but I wasn't sure."

„Yes, my parents were the main characters. Don't you mind that you also exist in a novel? Don't you miss your family?" I turned my head towards him.

„No, I don't." I knew he was lying. He always had difficulty being honest about his feelings when it came to his family. „I am just happy it happened when they were old enough to take care of themselves. They can do well even without me. And whether I mind it or not, it's not like I can change it. Besides, don't you remember what you told me?" He kissed me on the forehead.

„I said a lot of things, how should I know which one you are talking about?" I mumbled in embarrassment. Something like this wouldn't have made me blush before, but along with the familiarity it still was somehow new and my heart was fluttering.

„You told me that you thought books were little universes in themselves. It's been echoing in my head since I arrived here. And so I began to think writers have a special ability to see into other worlds without realizing it and write down what they see. That's why I think of this place as another realm, not a book."

„It would be amazing if it were true." I agreed.

„I had to believe it. If I were trapped in a book, I couldn't imagine a way out, but if I were in another world, then maybe there is a way that can lead me to you."

„Don't tell me you were looking for me?"

„Of course I was." It sounded like I was being ridiculous for thinking otherwise. „When I was old enough to travel alone, I consulted a lot of people about it and tried to find a portal or something. But no one had ever heard of another realm, let alone the path to it. I was ready to search till the day I died. I love you and I didn't want to live without you." That went straight to my heart.

„I never understood how you could be so open about your feelings for me and so bashful and reluctant when it came to your family."

„You're like air to me in a polluted world. I would suffocate without you, so I can't lose you for not expressing my feelings for you." It startled me. I was always afraid that his feelings were too intense. But I wasn't scared because of me, but because of him. I never wanted to be the center of his world, I always wanted him to be the most important for himself. He really hasn't changed.

„I love you, I always have, ever since I found out that you loved me and because of that I realized I love you, and I will probably love you until the day I perish...."

„But?" A small smile played on his lips.

„And I want to make you happy, but I don't want to be the only person or thing that can make you happy. I want you to have lots of stuff that can make you happy. I want to be happy with you, but I want you to be able to feel happiness without me too." I looked at him worriedly.

„I understand what you are saying and I know you are right, but..." He seemed hesitant.

„Were you happy in this world before you met me?"

„I have never been so free and unrestrained before and I have enjoyed having a lot of money and I met wonderful people...

„Were you or weren't you?" I interrupted him. „It's not a sin if you were, you know." He always felt like he had to be the last one in that imaginary line and felt guilty if he had a good time alone.

„I...was." It sounded like a confession to a priest, but I was happy to hear it. „But I often felt lonely. I looked around to show you something, but you were nowhere to be found." He added it a bit sheepishly, as if he wasn't sure wheter to say it or not.

„I missed you and my family and I was sad thinking about my old life, but I was happy with my new family. I could find happiness without you, and you could find happiness without me, and I think that is a wonderful thing."

„So you're breaking up with me?" Well, I guess we didn't break up so we were a couple all along...? It sounded so nonsensical.

„You are an idiot." I said and planted a kiss on his cheek. He hung his head in defeat and rested it on my shoulder. We let the silence lull us to sleep.