Mine

Chapter 4: Trying To Escape

I woke up the next day with a headache and not just a headache, I slept with my clothes on. Feeling groggy, I got up from the bed and headed to the bathroom to shower. Finishing up, I just wore a white tank top and sweat black shorts. I wasn't in the mood with the hair so I made a messy bun.
I stepped out of the bedroom and noticed that half of the Black family are eating breakfast. Mr. Black is sitting at the end of the table across from Darren and just got up when Mrs. Black appeared from the hallway in a hurry. Mr. Black pecked her on the lips, grabbed his suitcase and left the house.
"Good morning," I announced, surprised by them.
"Oh, good morning to you too, sweetie," Mrs. Black answered, drinking her coffee in a hurry.
I've noticed that she's wearing a formal business solid color suit jacket blazer dress pants and black high heels. She has her hair down and noticed how soft and silkier it is. She's beautiful.
"I'm going to work, Cecilia. If you need anything else, anything, Gloria is here. If money you need, Darren will give you some," she suggested, giving Darren messegage through her eyes.
I was just drinking water when she mentioned money and Darren that I almost choked. "What?! No. That's not necessary," I exclaimed, panicking a little.
The guy actually hates my presence and him handing me money is like him telling me to kill yourself, I thought, seeing the way he looked at his mom with a look that I don't understand.
She gave him one last warning from her eyes before meeting mines with a smile. "Honey, you're not a stranger. You're like my second daughter to me and what you want you can have from us. Just say the word," she suggested.
"Um, that's ok. I don't need anything. I have money. Thanks for the suggestion," I appreciated her by her kind words but wanting her to know I'm not that kind of person. And as for the money...
Wonder how many I got left? Curious. Well there's still my card.... feeling doubt just the thought of it.
"You'll get used to us. Well I'm going to be late. And like I said if you need anything, tell Gloria," and she's gone.
Gloria placed a plate of breakfast of where I should sit. I sat down and before Gloria leaves the kitchen I asked her, "Um, Gloria. Do you guys have some advil? My head hurts."
"Yes, madam," she nodded and went to the other side of the kitchen and opened up one of the cupboards.
As I started eating breakfast, Gloria placed the tablet next to my plate and left. Eva walked in a hurry, munching down of whatever or whoever's plate and drank her mom's coffee. I've noticed she has a backpack on.
"Good morning," she responded with a mouthful.
"Good morning to you too," I smirked at her.
"See ya. Heading to school, need anything?" she asked.
I shaked my head which it was a stupid move that I winced in pain as my headache worsen.
Didn't notice, she left. As Eva left, Gloria came back and picked up the plates from the table and took them to the sink.
"Do you want some help?" I asked her, decided to ignore Darren as I got up from my seat and taking my plate to the sink.
"Oh, no, madam. it's our job to do the housework. You rest," she suggested, surprised by helpfulness.
"I got nothing to do actually," realizing it.
"Go shopping?" she suggested it, shrugging and not knowing what to tell me.
"Uh, yeah. Or you know what? I'll just read a book," mentioning something like shopping means money and that make me feel unease.
"Whatever you like, madam," nodding.
I left her alone. I took the tablet and swallowed it with water. Just when I was about to pass Darren to go to my room, he grabbed my wrist. I gasped and looked at his hand on my wrist and looked at him in surprise. He didn't look at me, but was looking at his book that I just noticed and didn't say anything.
His hand that was around my wrist is so warm and so... right that sent me signals, but I pushed that thought and told myself that its not gonna happen. Also telling myself that I dont trust my feelings no more.
Darren took out some money from his pocket and gestured for me to take it. I was literally offended that I pulled my wrist forcefully from his and walked away, irritated. Part of me did want the money, but no. I'm not that weak.
Closing the door of the bedroom behind me and leaned against it. I can still feel his warmth on my wrist as I touched it.
Damn it, Cecilia! Haven't you learned your lesson from your ex? Do you want to get hurt that bad?! I exclaimed, being furious with myself.
I took a deep breath and decided to unpack and fix the bed. It took me an hour to finish and noticed that, as I sat on the tufted stool, I'm actually back home but not really with my family. If that make any sentence. I stared down at the floor and felt the pain emerging.
"Not today, Cecilia. Not now," I muttered to myself, my voice cracked as my throat started to hurt. I swallowed a couple of times and tried to push that thought away.
I need out! I need to breath, I suggested, grabbing my keys and getting out of the room.
Darren wasn't in the kitchen, but Gloria was and a woman along with her. Gloria is helping her with the supper.
I cleared my throat, making sure if its ok to speak. The two turned their heads toward me.
"Sorry if I cut you off guard, but will you let Darren that I'm out?" They both nodded. "Thanks," and left.
Just when I stepped out of the house, I remembered something.
Fuck!
I sighed, turning back and the woman was in the hall with a mob in her hand stopped.
"Guess we don't need these," gesturing at my car keys and placing it on the nearest table by the door. I closed the door behind me and decided to take a walk. I don't know where to go but it's better than staying in the house with fresh memories bursting in my brain and end up mopping.
I just looked around me; the houses, the cars, trees, and everything just so I can not think. I recognize a store that I once bought from them. I decided what the hell lets eat something that'll change my mood a bit. I have grabbed my handbag before leaving my bedroom just in case.
I chose a snicker bar, Max Lays salt and vinegar, and coke. As I got to the cashier, she told me how much. I decided to check the card. I swiped it on the device and...
"Decline, ma'am. Would you rather pay in cash?" sounded bored.
"Wait! What? How's it declined?" Shocked.
She gave me a shrug. "Want to check again?"
Without giving her an answer, I swiped my card again. The cashier said the same thing.
"So what will it be, ma'am?" she asked, chewing her gum patiently.
It felt like my whole body drained out of blood and turned cold. My own father would do this to me? Cut me off? Just like that?
My mind went into gear as I tried to process all of this as I felt like my whole world just collapsed into pieces. It's not about the credit card or the money, it's how he completely erased me, pushed me away like I didn't exist anymore. My eyes started to water, my breathing turned into a shaky breath, and my throat started to hurt because of the pain that my own family are treating me.
I jumped when the cashier tried to get my attention. "Sorry but you either buy in cash or just leave," she muttered, sounded annoyed.
"S-sorry. I'll leave," I suggested, leaving the junk food on the cashier counter and left the store.
I power walked toward the nearest park and made sure to not stop at anything. As I got there, I went to my favorite spot where nobody even goes there, never a single person ever thought to go in there: the forest. I had to go a little bit deeper until I reached my meadow. Just when I got there, I collapsed on my hands and knees and cried freely. I let out a scream that filled with anger, pain, and loss. I grabbed anything that is close to me and threw it across the small meadow. Just as I took out all my anger and frustration out in the open, it died down. That only left me sobbing silently, feeling weak. I sat there, sniffling, not knowing what's going to happen next.
Across from me a lone wolf appeared through the bushes, its silver white eyes stared at me through hunger as it took a step toward me. I completely froze. The pain, the sadness, everything was gone and placed it with fear. My heart started pounding in my ears really hard and quickly, not sure what to do. I swallowed and watched it as it took another step toward me. I don't know why but my instinct kicked in forcing me to get up and run back where I came from. I can hear it chasing after me, but since the roots, bushes, and trees are in the way, I can play along with it, to lose it. Just when I'm in the clearing where there's people, I still kept running until I can actually feel myself safe. I hunched over to steady my breath and waited for my heart to beat normally. Maybe going back to my spot isn't a good idea or getting out of the house, too. I checked myself and found scratches all over me from the branches and dirt on my knees. I sighed and started to walk back to the house when a hand was placed on my shoulder. I thought, stupidly, it was a wolf but then I said to myself, a wolf has paws, not hands. Just before I thought that, I jumped and was ready to scream when I caught sight of a familiar face that I haven't seen in years: my ex- best friend Shelby.
Shelby Waynesfield is a cute dirty blonde, blue eyed, and full lower lip who can make any guy fall in love with her... sort of. Seeing her face makes me remember all the good time we had together, until Lucy appeared in the picture.
Anger and disgust showed in my face and how I feel toward her that I sneered, "what do you want?"
"P- people would say hi when greeting. So... hi," she stuttered, nervous. I gave her a narrowed gaze. "I... J-just saw you running and I was wondering if you're...ok."
At the mention of the word "ok" hit a nerve.
"Ok?! Do you think I'm ok?! Huh, Shelby?! All these years that went away; betrayed, manipulated, used, and abandoned and you come along and asked me if I'm ok?! God! Do you even hear yourself?" I snarled as my eyes started to water, remembering the way she walked away from me because she thought that I've been talking shit behind her back in a mean way when it wasn't true. It was always Lucy.
Taking a deep breath and said, "just go to hell."
"Ce', I didn't know she was behind it I swear. I'm sorry," she apologizes, begging.
"Didn't know?! Have you thought for a second about the years that we spent time together? Sharing secrets? The sleep overs? The fun we had? If we have something to say, we call each other even if its in the middle of the night," I listed, shaking with anger and betrayal. "And all I get is that you didn't know it was her? I complained about her ALL THE TIME! How she is a manipulative bitch! I cannot believe how you fell for her tricks! My own best. Friend!" Shaking my head in disappointment.
It was her turn to go into tears as she apologized again, "I'm sorry. I promise it won't happen again."
"It's too late for that. I don't trust you anymore. I don't trust anyone anymore," and just like that I'm the one who walked away from her, feeling empty.
I can hear her calling for me but I kept going as a tear escaped from my eyes, hating the life I'm living in. Just thinking that today wont get any worse, I saw my ex. He was texting or God knows what he was doing on his phone and doesn't know I'm walking his way. Tall, lean, brown eyes, brown hair and a dimple on his chin when he smiles. I liked him because he was sweet, and a bit cute. I would never have thought of him weak around girls. He was... loyal to me and honest until Lucy...
I turned my head the other side and acted like I'm itching the side of my head. Just as we passed each other, I didn't look back. I kept going until I was around the corner I started running.
Why does it have to be me?! Why does stuff kept happening to me? I wondered, hoping I wont end up seeing any of my family, especially Lucy. I'm not scared of her but the thought of what she's planning to do with me, without me knowing, scares me.
Thoughts and questions popping in and out of my mind, wondering if she knew I'd come back from New York then she'd be planning it quickly. It's the accusation and lies coming from them hurts me even more. And she likes to see me hurt.
What does she want from me?! I thought, blinded by my own tears. She took my family, friends, and my boyfriend. What does she want from me? trying to wipe away the tears to see better when unexpectedly a sound so loud was ready to break my ear drum. Not only that something bumped into my hip and I fell hard on my arm, scathing it. The hit wasn't hard but it'll leave a bruise.
"Oh, my God! Are you alright?" A male voice asked, worried and panicked as he got out of his car. "I'll call the ambulance!" With shaking hands, trying to take his phone out.
"No! I'm fine! I'm sorry I wasn't, I wasn't paying attention," getting up and looked at my arm. Street burn.
He saw my red cheeked wet face and the scratches. He looked horrified and started to panic even more, thinking the accident is from him.
"No, sir! It's not from you! I promise you that," I started to walk away. I turned and ran, leaving the poor guy all white faced.
I turned around the corner and reached the Black's house. I opened the front door and headed toward the kitchen, feeling out of breath. Gloria and the other woman saw the state of me and were shocked.
"Madam, what happened to you?!" Gloria replied, looking a bit worried while taking some napkins in a hurry.
I went to the sink to actually wash my arm and ignored them because my arm is stinging me. Just when I opened it, I didn't pay attention that the lever of the faucet is on hot and I can hear their outburst about changing the lever but I ignored them. Darren, which I haven't noticed, walked in the kitchen, wanting to know what's going on. As hot water immediately touched my skin, I screamed in pain.
"FUCK!" I screamed out, backing away from the sink.
Darren rushed to my side, turned the lever to cold and actually grabbed my upper arm, which I'm cradling, and his other hand placed it on my waist and brought me close to the sink. His body heat made contact with mines and his warmth engulfed me that I almost fainted.
"It's cold. Put your arm there. It's ok. It's not hot," he assured me, his voice gentle.
My heart is completely going crazy; from the pain, from being scared that it might be still hot, and from how close he is. I should be aware of how close his face to mines that I watched how he placed my injured arm under the cold water and spoke.
"Could you explain to me what happened to you?" he asked, sounded serious.
"I..." I trailed off, not knowing where to start and I didn't want to mention the money problem and how I'm literally in pain. He waited for my answer as I decided that I won't give him all the details.
Before I could answer, he closed the faucet and turned me to the kitchen table and sat me down. He's too close that our legs are sandwiched together and he placed my injured arm on the table. He told the woman for ointment and a bandage.
"Well?" he asked, waiting for my response, placing the ointment on my injured arm that the woman brought.
"I guess I needed some air and went out and I made a mistake of leaving because..." taking a deep breath of what I'm about to say because I wouldn't believe it myself. "The thing is you might not believe it but when I went to the forest and went to my favorite spot, I saw a wolf."
Darren immediately stopped at what he's doing and the kitchen went completely quiet.
"What did you say?" he asked, not sure if he heard right.
"I know, a wolf! I mean it was staring at me with those hungry eyes and- and I was completely in shock. It took a few steps toward me and my instincts kicked in and I started running. I didn't know if it is chasing me or not but I ran before I broke free from the trees and into the park where there's alot of people there," noticing that I'm babbling like crazy.
"Then why would you go in the forest in the first place?" Steven replied, coming up from behind and making me jump of how quiet his steps are. "Why didn't you just go to the park or the mall instead?"
Darren went back to my arm and shaked his head in I don't know in what emotion on his face.
"Ok, first of all. I have a reason not to go to the park or the mall and second I've been going to my spot for like whenever I'm... upset," I hesitated a bit, not wanting to bring that up and end up averting their gaze.
Steven sat across from us and asked, "then how did you end up like this?"
"I was getting to that," I muttered, disgruntled. "After I'm out of the forest, I kept on running until I felt safe. I didn't know I was in this state until... I met someone," feeling the disappointment washing over me as I recalled the conversation between my ex- best friend and me.
Darren hesitated a bit as he started wrapping the bandage around my injured arm when I mentioned "met someone."
"I didn't want to see anyone I know but-" I said.
"Did you pick a fight with that person?"
"No. Just...An argument. And like I said I didn't want to see anyone but I didn't expect to see her," I muttered, noticed that Darren is finished up with me.
Darren looked at me and underneath that gaze is something that I couldn't understand. "So the scratches, leafs, and the mud from the forest?" I nodded. "The arm?"
"Yeah, before the car hit me, I saw my ex. I made sure he didn't see me and when I was a bit far away I started running. I didn't pay attention to where I was going until the car hit me. It wasn't a hard bump its more like a gentle kind and that's how I end up on the ground," I explained, feeling somewhat stupid.
"You know, you could have gone to the backyard instead of the forest," mumbled, Steven.
I looked at him, frowning. "Steven, I have a reason to get out."
"Yeah? By going to the forset?"
This got even more complicated as I looked down at my hand as I said, "coming back here is hard for me, ok? I never thought it would be like this. I was hoping that it'd be different but I was wrong."
It was quiet until Steven apologies, sounded like he means it, "sorry."
I nodded as the pain creeping up. I cleared my throat and mumbled to them that I have to wash up, wanted to be left alone.
Darren never said anything after that....