Never Say Never / louis tomlinson [ON HOLD]

Chapter 5

ciaras p.o.v.

I walked up the steps to my house, my body shaking with fear thinking louis was in there waiting for me, waiting to ask what happened to me last night after i shoved him out the door.

My mum suggested to his mum that me and him have a study session over at my house while they were both gone on a buisness trip together.

I took a breath and walked through the door, a smiling louis got up from watching tv and greeted me. He wasnt wearing his blue jean jacket he normally wore, so that was new. Instead he was wearing a white tank top which looked really good on him, and his hair was floppy which i loved.

My greeting was shaky and my hands were trembling. Louis' smiling face instantly turned into a concerned one.

"Love, you okay?" he asked. I nodded, feeling a little drowsy, worried to death that he'd find out and tell everyone or something.

"You're lying, ciara, whats wrong? Tell me." he held my sweaty and trembling hands and he looked down at them. "You have small hands like me." he tried to make me laugh but it didnt work. I started crying before i could get the words "Help me" out of my mouth because i didnt know how to feel. "Ciara, whats wrong? Help you with what?" his blue eyes looked into my green ones and i grabbed his hand and took him to the bathroom and locked the door.

"Ciara, why are we-" the blade i pulled from the cabinet under the sink cut him off instantly and left him speechless. He then gasped and said, "Show me." in the most serious voice i have ever heard him use. Clearly he hasnt been through this with any other girls.

I cried as i rolled up my sleeves, showing him the cuts the blade made on my skin. He didnt say a word. He just kissed them and hugged me tight. My tears stained his shirt and after a while of me hugging someone i loved and hated and someone hugging a screwed up girl, he finally spoke.

"Why did you do this?" he asked, softly. I gulped and prepared for what was about to come after i said it.

"You." I tried to yell but ended up saying it quietly. He stood in front of me as i backed up slowly away from him, knowing what he was fixing to do.

He looked angry and then he punched the wall with intense force, making his knuckles bleed.

He cursed out loud many times and i told him to calm down.

"No! I'm not going to calm down!" he raised his voice. "I did that to you!" he screamed "I did that to you and I didnt even realize it!" he shouted. "Louis, calm down!" "No! I won't calm down! I couldve killed you, ciara! I never even knew that i made you do that to yourself! I'm so stupid!" he shouted, punching the wall again.

"Louis, stop!" I grabbed both of his wrists and held them tight. "Louis, it wasnt just your fault!" i said. "It was mine too." i admitted. "No, ciara, it was mostly mine. I'm so stupid. I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry." he had tears in his eyes, he wrapped some toilet paper around his knuckles then sat down next to me and held me while we both cried.