A hobby No one knows

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Few months were passed and I still can't able to figure out that why I felt so good watching a dead body. Death didn't scared me a lot. I feel like every one will go one day and you should not bother much about it. But watching it is extremely difficult, but for me it's interesting and peaceful.
I'm still used to watch cremation and funeral videos on internet and then sleep peacefully. I dream a lot about death bodies and a lot of such things. I used to figure out why I'm like that. It's strange because girls are tend to be soft and humble and calm but on the other hand here it's me !! who wants to be around death now, yes!! My hobby of watching a dead body is now upgraded. I feel good watching it getting burnt in the cremation Ground  being a law student I'm more interested in criminal laws. I'm always been a person born with a  older child arogence.  I'm sweet, helpful and happy. I love reading novels and painting and a lot of stuffs but the hobby of being around death scared me a lot when I thought of killing my ex and want to see him death.
I used to read a lot about death, pain and anger and a lot of stuffs.

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