The Help

Reality /tw suicide attempt

                               Candance             

Flashbacks*
⚠️tw suicide attempt

I woke up to the sound of my best friend calling my name in distress. I tried to speak but words just wouldn't come out.

"It's ok love I got you." My best friend said with tears coming down."I just need you to stay awake until the paramedics arrive, can you do that for me?" She said.

I nodded my head feeling awful that I put her into this position. I looked around until I saw the bottle of pills that I had taken, I didn't want this to be real.

A few moments later, we hear the paramedics pulling up. As soon as I heard them walk through the door, I slowly closed my eyes not wanting this to be my reality. At least not right now.

Present*

"Candace." My therapist called out to me. I must've zoned out because I didn't hear what she said.

"I'm sorry, could you repeat that?" I asked.

"Don't worry about what I just said, I want to know what were you thinking about just now?" She said looking curious.

"Oh um, the day where I tried to off myself. It keeps playing over and over in my head." I said looking at the floor.

"Ok, If you don't mind I want to ask why. Why did you act on your thoughts that day? What happened to make you get to that point?" Naomi said while writing on her notepad.

"Everyone thinks I'm depressed because I tried to, but I was just sad that day and had thoughts in my head," I said

"So you don't think you're depressed? You think it's "normal" to have thoughts when you are just sad?" She asked

"No, I mean doesn't everyone have sad days and have thoughts too? To you, it might not be normal but I think it is." I said being annoyed with all of the questions. I just wanted to go home. This wasn't my idea it was my best friend. If she didn't convince me to go to therapy I wouldn't have.

Naomi sensed that I was becoming tense with all of the questions. "Hey I know this is not a conversation you want to have, but I need you to open up to me. I'm just here to help you become better. Don't you want that?" She asked looking straight into my eyes.

I looked at her with sad eyes. "I don't know what I want." That broke me and I started crying. Naomi got up and comforted me.

"I know this is hard but you have a great support system to help you through this process. I just need you to trust me. I promise I am only here to help you ok hon? And I'm very proud of you and the progress you've made." Naomi said while rubbing my back.

I just nodded in appreciation. I knew now that this was my reality and I had to push through even if I didn't want to.

------------
chap 1
505 words