Pride's Silent Howl | Remus Lupin

Chapter 9- Confrontation

Athena did as she planned to. She stayed in bed the entire day. Sleeping, eating, finishing her homework, sleeping, eating, thinking, dreaming. She never cared to be surrounded by people. She found solace in herself. She loved her own company.

She asked Hermione, Ron, and Harry to inform her professors that she wasn't keeping well and that she would make up for her classes in her free time. She knew that they wouldn't care much knowing her scores were nothing less than "Exceeding Expectations".

And so here she was, by herself, with her thoughts once more.

Fred. His kiss-

Ocean eyes.

Ok no.

Fred. Not him.

Chocolates.

What the fuck.

She couldn't stop thinking about him.

She picked up her Astronomy books and headed towards the library, making sure she was away from any professor's peripheral. She couldn't spend her entire day thinking about him. It was unprofessional and just wrong. Besides, nothing was going on. Right?

She felt shivers down her spine when she thought about last night. How they spent hours in silence, just feeling each other's presence. Or when he would ask her about things that would even go unnoticed by her own best friends. Was that normal?

She shrugged the thought away. She hated the fact that she couldn't control her thoughts.

Minutes led to hours and Athena was still in the library. She was about to begin reading about the Orion star when she suddenly felt someone's hand on her shoulder.

Startled. She looked up only to be met with the face of a familiar redhead. Fred.

"Can we talk?" he asked.

"of course,"

He sat down.

"Right so, about last night. Uh- I'm sorry. I shouldn't have kissed you. I was drunk and well yea it was a moment of weakness and I hope this doesn't change things between us." He was shaking his leg and anxiously waiting for her reply.

"It's okay Fred, I understand."

She couldn't give him hope. Not when-

not when she wasn't in love with him.

"Great! So, we're good?"

"Duh."

He released a breath of relief.

"How'd it go down with Snape? I reckon he gave you a piece of his mind." He asked.

Quite the contrary actually.

"Uh it was nothing." She shrugged the topic away.

A moment passed.

"So, you'll be at the Burrow for Christmas?" He asked, hopeful.

The burrow was where the Weasleys lived. It was tradition for Harry, Athena and occasionally Hermione to spend every holiday there. Molly, the mum, was the kindest and most generous soul that shared everything she possibly could. She knitted sweaters and made delicious home-cooked food. Arthur, or to Athena, Mr. Weasley, was a sweet jolly man who had the power to see good in everyone. They didn't have much, but they never complained. Athena would often try to pay them back slyly with gifts and materialistic things. She had nothing else to offer.

"Of course, wouldn't miss it." She replied immediately.

The day went by smoothly. Athena had other things like studies occupying her mind that kept her busy. After staying clear of Snape's path and confronting Fred about last night, she felt at ease and slept peacefully, dreaming of her deepest desire once more.

The next day, she woke up in good spirits, looking forward to what the day had to present her with. She got ready and walked towards the Great Hall and joined her friends for breakfast. She looked towards the teacher's table and was met with Snape's terrifying glare. She ignored it. It's a good thing that Athena didn't give a flying shit about his temper because those eyes had the power to make students faint from terror.

What Athena really was interested in, was the empty seat beside Snape. Professor Lupin's seat. A wave of sadness came over her. He probably wasn't back yet from his short trip to Diagon Alley. She thought.

So, she skipped Defence class once more.

On the third day, she was hopeful. She got ready and walked inside the Great Hall and immediately looked at the teacher's table. He still wasn't there.

Where was this man?

She wondered why he didn't specify how many days he would be gone the other night in the Astronomy Tower. She didn't know why it affected her. It's not like he owed her anything, let alone an explanation.

She told herself that she felt disappointed not because he wasn't there, but because she would have to skip defence or face Snape till his return.

So, she skipped his class once more.

The next day, she didn't think of him at all. She woke up, got dressed, and headed towards the Great Hall as usual. She didn't even look at the teacher's table. It was tempting but, she didn't.

Her first class was herbology. She made her way through the East Hallways of the castle but as she was about to take a turn to enter the greenhouses, she bumped into someone and dropped her books.

"Shit, I'm sor-" she began to apologise but paused when she got a whiff of something awfully familiar.

Chocolates and cigarettes.

The feeling. Her heart.

She looked up.

"-WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO YOU?" she finished.

He was covered in new scars and had gashes all over his hands. She could see red cuts on his neck which undoubtedly trailed further down his chest. He looked tired and pale, just as he did on the train a month ago.

"Hello to you too Ms. Sinclair." He said with a smile as he bent down to help her gather her books.

"Did you end up in Knock Turn Alley instead of Diagon Alley?". She asked with concern.

"No".

"Well did you pick a fight with someone?"

He cleared his throat. "Uh no. I uh- had a fall."

"From the ASTRONOMY TOWER??"

He smiled. He could see that she was genuinely worried.

"No no. I was yea I don't know I guess I slipped".

They stared at each other for a moment, till he broke the silence.

"So, how are you? Snape's been telling me you have been missing my classes." He mentioned as they got up.

"Will you hold it against me?" she asked.

"I couldn't possibly." He said softly.

He handed her books over to her but as he did so, their fingers brushed each other for a moment. A second if you will.

She felt her fingers burn; he felt his burn. Their hearts raced.

They looked at each other immediately.

The world stopped.

There was no way he felt the same thing. Athena thought.

That very same question lingered in his mind.

"Well, I hope you will attend class today?" he asked as he fiddled with his fingers.

"Yeah. Uh of course".

He nodded with a smile and walked away.

Athena tried to calm down, but her heart had a mind of its own. It was racing. She could hear it beat in her ear.

"Athena? You alright?" Ron asked.

"Yes, let's go. We're late for class."