Beg For More

Whatever Will Be, Will Be

Blaze

She friend-zoned me.

My girlfriend friend zoned the shit out of me and I think she enjoyed it.

I hated being without her and now I was with her WITHOUT her. The guys were tickled. They watched me struggle as she teased me after that night. The girl even left with Kenny. KENNY.

She said he just took her home and left. I believed her. Every day, it was like we were dating or just good friends. She'd park in the back lot and walk to class without giving me much attention save for a wave here and there.

At lunch, she'd sit across from me and we'd talk, but if I tried to touch her, she'd inch away from me.

Since the weather was quite warm, she wore clothes that accentuated her figure and I was so sick of hearing how fucking hot she was. I knew that already and I was getting extended blue balls over it.

I found myself sitting next to her in class again and she'd bite that bottom lip of hers whenever I was watching and I was always watching.

We were paired up into groups and when her hand or leg brushed mine, I melted. She'd smile at me devilishly. The little minx knew what she was doing and I definitely knew what I was missing.

She'd deliberately bend over in front of me, turning her head to smile and wink in my direction, and I couldn't even smack her ass or reach out and squeeze it. Greg and Melissa were all over each other. Apparently, prom night was electric for them after they headed back to Greg's place. I was so sick of hearing about it but I was happy for them.

"Why are you doing this?" I whispered to her at her locker, "You know it's killing me."

"Because I'm enjoying it," she'd say, caressing my face and bouncing away before I could grab her to claim those lips of hers .

I deserved it, but I played the game, too. I knew she needed to trust me again and I needed the same from her.

We talked about how fast we'd taken it before and how we both needed to know if it was real. But dammit it was real. We loved each other and I was courting my existent girlfriend.

I knew it was killing her, too. She wanted to touch me and sometimes she'd reach out to me, but quickly pull away.

We were sitting on some bleachers near the track field and I'd brushed some strands of hair out of her face. My hand must have lingered on her cheek too long because she turned away from me.

"I'm sorry," I told her.

"Me too," she'd say.

And that's when I knew she needed to do this. We needed this to come to terms with what we'd done and be normal, or as normal as the two of us could be.

Sapphire

He understood me and that's what mattered.

It felt weird to "date" him. We didn't even hold hands and I desperately wanted to.

The girls joked about getting me a chastity belt, but it was more than that. I wanted this to be real. I ached for him every moment of every day, but I just had to know.

The whole school knew about us. I could hear them talking about us when they thought I wasn't listening. Some of Blaze's old flames added me to their hate list, but I didn't care. Some of them even dared to try to get back with him,but he was still mine and I made that known.

I found him in the library one day, finally paying his book fine. He followed me up the stairs to my little nook, but we didn't speak. He'd been sketching a lot lately and I was writing. When I got up to leave, he didn't, but he smiled at me and continued drawing.