The Running Diaries - Journey To Half Marathon

Day 26-30

Lockdown day 26

Another day in paradise

And I write this with as little sarcasm as possible, because today I ran 10KM and I did it in under an hour. I woke up early, decided that if I keep putting it off then I'll never do it and I just ran, out of the little bubble that I live here in Summerseat and 3 miles down the road towards Bury. There wasn't a single car on the roads. Slightly annoyed that I had to stop a few times past the 5K mark, but I don't know why I'm expecting to be able to go straight into a 5K without stopping at all.

The 3 miles there seemed a lot easier than I had in my head, the 3 miles back however was slightly up hill, longer than I'm used to doing and I was really conscious of the fact that I would miss my start time at work if I took too long, which unbelievably I was actually ready to start early.
They say that 5K is tough and once you reach that point, extending it further is easier, but I somehow think that they mean extending it gradually, because that 10K was far from easy, but also didn't feel way beyond my capabilities.
Once I'd reached 5K, then I allowed myself to count down. I told myself that I run 5K every day, it's just like putting two days into one and I'm not sure how, but tricking myself into that made it feel much easier than I thought. Obviously, I'm not saying that it was a walk in the park and that I can take on any distance, I'm just saying that I expected it to be a lot harder, I painted the image in my head of me puffing and phlegming and collapsing on the side of the road, waiting to be found by a stranger.

I already know that I have the HIIT classes, healthy eating and the 5K almost every day to thank for how good that felt compared to how the 10K in September felt. I'm not actually sure how I just rocked up and ran 10K that day, especially considering how unfit I was. The thing with running 10K, is that now I know I can do it and now, 5K seems a little too tame. I need to think of a routine, one where I run 10K twice a week, to push me out of that comfort zone and to get my body used to it, the other days will be 5K and then I'm definitely going to have to put a rest in there...somewhere.

Obviously, a post has already been put on social media to inform everyone that I'm not just their average Joe anymore, instead I am a long distance runner. That's right, I've stepped up from 5K to a stunning 10K distance and I did it in under an hour, what a champion I am.

Most people who began running in lockdown have now given up, meaning that yes, I'll probably be at the next Olympics. The 2 slices of toast I have every morning taste better after a 10K and drinking water is much easier when I'm absolutely parched and still suffering from the dry mouth that I developed at around 4KM. Managed to actually be more productive at work too and actually feel more present.

No longer look at Joe Wicks on TV and think "What a show off", but instead I think "I could do that" and actually, I also think that I could crush him in a burpee challenge. I think that this shift in my attitude has literally come from running a distance that I told myself I wouldn't be able to do and now I sit here and wonder why I ever doubted myself. Well, I know exactly why I doubted myself and it's because I have done it for so many years now that it's just become a part of my daily thought process. I'm not sure how many people on this earth doubt themselves daily, but I must be up there with one of the few people who constantly do it without realising. I guess it's normal to doubt yourself when you've not yet proved that you can do it. It's the self doubt that often puts me off proving myself wrong, though and then I fall into the same process of giving up before I've even started.

Reminder to myself: You can do the things you said you can't.

I've noticed throughout a lot of things in my life, that saying 'I can't' very quickly turns into 'I won't' and the reason is because I'm terrified of failing. I'm scared that people will snigger behind my back, I'm scared that they'll laugh and say "I knew she couldn't do it" and I have this view because personally, I also say that about myself which is really annoying but it's just who I am and it's something that I can't change.