Baarish hai khayalon mein, sab dhul jayega
Roshan rasta naya ek khul jayega
Beh jayega, tinka tinka dil ka silsila, chalo...
Mil jayega, aur ek haseen kafila, chalo...
Dhoop ke makan sa yeh, hai safar dhalan sa yeh
Mod meherbaan sa hai yeh....
Shivaay smiled. His eyes remained on Bhavya, Rudra and Sahil playing with the newest member of their family. He cooed and Shivaay's heart glowed. Beside him, Anika noisily sipped on her Bobba tea and giggled like a schoolgirl. His heart glowed more.
The song couldn't be more accurate. He had found a new tribe. The rains had indeed washed away the pain of his past. Slowly but surely, they all managed to build a new home, a new life. There were days when he found himself thinking about his past life. He did find himself thinking of how life would have been had nothing gone wrong. He would have married Tia. How would that feel?
But those thoughts were fleeting. They were mere glimpses between the beautiful dream that he was living right now. They didn't really matter.
Shivaay's eyes remained on his cherubic little son throughout the dinner. He was so much like him. He had the same eyes, same nose and same smile. Every time Ansh's little fingers sought his, he felt like his heart would explode with happiness. His baby was his piece of heart. Shivaay didn't know if it was possible to love another human with such intensity at first glance but Ansh had changed that. From the moment he was pulled out, Shivaay knew that he had fallen for someone again. This time, a part of him and Anika.
He looked at Anika and sighed. She was...he didn't even know now. The words had dried up. He hadn't lied to Rudra. She and him, they were one. They were the same.
He was happy. Finally. His penance had paid off.
"Shivaay," Anika cleared her throat. "I want to talk to you."
For a brief moment, his heart sank. She was sitting in front of him with a grim expression. Her eyes were lined with worry. No pity. Or was it sympathy? He couldn't tell. But it was something. Her mood was off from the time she received a call at dinner but Shivaay had brushed it aside thinking it was about her work. Now, he was reassessing his judgement. It was definitely something else.
"Kya hua?" His voice was meek.
She took a deep breath and sat cross-legged in front of him. Then she took his hands in his. "I got a call from Mumbai. It's Dadi. She is ill. It's time...it's inevitable."
Shivaay suddenly felt his vision blur. His grandmother was dying. His heart thudded painfully. Why had no one told him? Was she too sick? Why were they informing him now when he could do nothing to help her? The questions swirled in his mind.
But then, he remembered. Memories of that day flashed in front of his eyes. He was thrown out. Dadi didn't want to see him. He was the Bastard son for them. They wanted to have no relationship with him. Hell, they didn't even want to see his face. He was the manhoos one in the family. He remembered everything. The desperate nights, the starving, the begging, the time he had tried to put an end to his life.
The bedroom swam before his eyes.
"Shivaay..." Anika moved closer to him. She clutched his shoulder with one hand and the other went to her chest like always. She lightly stroked the straight, ugly scar like it was the most beautiful thing in the world. She then insisted, "Look at me."
He didn't. He kept his eyes on the way Anika's hand rested on that scar. He remembered that day. He had tried to stab himself. He didn't know if it was a moment of weakness or just full-blown madness but he wanted that heart to stop. He remembered thinking that the heart was the root cause of everything - it felt too much, it made him do insane things for his loved ones, it beat too much. Yes. It beat too much. So, it had to stop. He had taken a butcher's knife and slashed his chest.
