Snapshot · (Roswell Fanfiction) · √

30. Coming Clean

Anger was already building inside of him when her quiet voice shocked every thought and emotion out of his body. "It's Max."

Liz felt him tense against her and she pulled her head back to look at him. Sobbing, she pleaded with him to, "Please don't be mad."

"I..." Michael mumbled with shock smeared across his features.

Liz sniffled, tears running unhindered down her cheeks. "I love him."

"But..." Michael stared at his little sister. "You mean as a friend, right? Like a sister loves a brother?"

Biting her trembling bottom lip, she slowly shook her head and Michael pulled away from her.

Quietly, with something akin to fear in his eyes, he asked, "What did he do? Did he...What did he do?"

"He hasn't done anything," Liz whispered, and sniffled, "Nothing that I didn't...agree to."

Michael stared at her and almost spit the words out. "And you love him?"

Liz nodded miserably. "I don't want to. It would be so much easier if I didn't."

She wiped at the tears with the back of her hand, her voice hitching on her sobs. There was no turning back now. "We...we slept together."

Anger flickered across Michael's face and then he was on his feet, staring down at her with his chest moving rapidly with every upsetting breath. "That fucking bastard..."

"No," Liz whispered, pleading with him to continue to listen. To not lose control. Not yet.

She needed him. She needed him to listen. She had wanted to tell him for so long, but she had been afraid. Afraid of what she was feeling. Afraid of admitting it to someone. Afraid of what he would do when he found out. But also afraid of how it would affect Michael and Max's friendship. "He didn't take advantage of me. He was really sweet and... He never wanted to hurt me."

Michael shook his head in angry disbelief. "He had sex with you?"

She realized that she was not getting through to him at all. In desperation, she leaned forward, her voice tight as she pleaded with him to, "Please listen. I need to talk to you about this. I need you to listen."

Michael tried to swallow back the nausea at the back of his throat. "You want me to listen? You want me to listen about how my best friend fucked my little sister?"

Liz flinched at his choice of words and how he in one single sentence had managed to degrade her experience with Max. "It wasn't like that."

"Haven't you seen what he does with girls?" Michael asked, wondering how his smart sister could be so stupid. Disappointment was pushing through his body, firmly interlaced with hatred towards Max. "He bangs them and then pushes them out the door before they even have time to put their panties back on."

"He doesn't," Liz whispered, not knowing if she was telling the truth or not.

Because what Michael had just said was the exact reason why she hadn't dared to even consider pursuing a relationship with Max. That and the fear of how Michael would react, which she was getting the full show of right now.

"You've been around him just as much as I've had, Lizzie. You know that it's true. How could you let him touch you?"

Michael loved Max like a brother and he had never particularly worried about Max's playboy status. Until now.

"Could you just listen?!" Liz said loudly, amongst heartbreaking sobs.

"How long, Lizzie? How long has this been going on?"

"Two days before Christmas," Liz sobbed, "four years ago."

All air seemed to go out of him and he sank down onto the TV-table. "Jesus."

"It was just one night. Nothing has happened since then."

"He fucking lied to me," Michael murmured, remembering the conversation he'd had with Max just a couple of days after Christmas when he had asked Max straight out if he had slept with Liz.

"Don't just blame him. Blame me too. I don't want to... I didn't tell you because I didn't want to ruin your friendship with him."

"It's ruined," Michael said quietly, his whole body looking worn.

His words cut through her heart and she moved to kneel in front of him, looking up into his hanging head with pleading eyes. "Don't do that."

"He played a game with you, didn't he?" Michael asked.

Liz shook her head in denial, but Michael could easily read the insecurity in her eyes.

"That's why there was just one night."

"I can't trust him," Liz said, her heart breaking as she heard the words out loud. "I can't trust him with my heart."

Michael looked at her, taking a deep breath.

"All this time..." he shook his head bitterly. "All the times I've found you fighting... It was more serious than it appeared, wasn't it?"

"Sometimes, yes," Liz answered. "He wants to talk about it. He's been trying to talk to me for the last four years."

Michael frowned. That's odd. Why would Max invest so much time in trying to sort things out if Liz had just been another game to him? "Why haven't you? Why haven't you talked?"

Liz swallowed, dropping her eyes. "Because I'm afraid that he will say something that will make me want him even more."

The anguish in her voice tore at his heart strings and he slid to the floor, enveloping her in his arms.

His warmth made her sobs start anew and she murmured against his shoulder. "I'm so scared, Michael."

"Of what?"

"Of everything inside of me. It hurts...so much."

He smiled sadly into her hair, confused about the feelings that were boiling inside his body. Feelings that he had just temporarily managed to put a lid on because Liz needed him now. "It sounds like you're in love, sis."

She started crying again, hitching out the words in between sobs, "I think he loves me too. I really think he does. And that scares the hell out of me. Because I can't disappoint him. And I don't want him to...get tired of me and move on. So I've been playing this game. To keep him close, but still far away. So he can't reach me but still won't go away."

Michael sighed heavily. "Couldn't you have fallen for someone else? Why Max Evans?"

She gave a teary laugh at his weary voice, which had a small smile grazing his lips as well. Amongst all turbulent feelings, Michael felt a contentment he hadn't felt in years move through him. His little sister had let him into her life again. He used to know everything about her and then one day she suddenly became so distant.

He had suspected that something had been a bit off between his friend and his sister, but he would've never guessed that their strained relationship was the reason why his relationship with his sister had fallen apart.

"And," Michael said seriously, pulling back and lovingly pushing Liz's hair out of her face. "If you ever want to let Max know how you feel, I suggest you tell him soon, before I get to him."

Liz buried her face in her hands, her voice muffled as she said anxiously, "I can't tell him. I can never tell him."

She removed her hands and looked at him seriously. "And you can't tell him either."

"I can't promise that, squirt," Michael said. "There's no way I can pretend like nothing happened."

"I don't expect you to," Liz said softly, "I just don't want him to know that I...feel something for him."

Michael looked at her closely, right then realizing that his baby sister had grown up. She was a hot-blooded woman with complex thoughts and strong emotions. She had always been strong-headed, but when had she gone from taunting boys into crying over boys?

"What do you want, Lizzie?"

She looked at him, biting her bottom lip nervously. What did she want?

What did she want?