Heartstrings | Jade x Tori

Chapter 9: Seriously Hungover

Tori's PoV

*___________*

I felt an instant wave of nausea hit me as I opened my eyes. I'd survived the night, but I was now lying alone on top of the sheets in a spare bedroom somewhere within the party house. I groaned as I felt a sharp pain in my head, and forced my body upright in the bed. I wasn't really sure how I'd ended up there, or even where anyone else was. Where Jade was. I shut my eyes again, and attempted to remember the events of last night, and despite my horrible hangover, it didn't take long for memories to start flooding back, and for me to realise I had not been drunk enough to forget any of it. I remembered all of it.

Okay, I was with Jade... We were together and then she saw Beck kissing that girl... We went to look around and we were in a spare room together... She went outside to smoke... Oh god, I totally embarrassed myself trying that cigarette... Then she told me about her past. Shit, what am I even going to say to her about that? I wonder if she even remembers... Okay, then we headed back downstairs afterwards to keep on partying a little after that. We drank more, danced more, then I kissed her.

Wait a second, I fucking kissed her.

My eyes opened themselves in a split second, and I felt my heart beginning to race. Shit, shit, shit. Why did I do that? I removed myself from the bed, and started pacing around the room. I was still wearing the exact same outfit as the night before, except, when I caught sight of myself in the mirror I looked a whole lot more disheveled than I had when I was getting ready. My hair was a mess, my makeup was barely holding on, and I also now looked a whole lot more disturbed now I'd remembered how my night had ended.

It's not exactly like it's a rare thing for girls to get drunk and kiss at a party, but for me, that idea was terrifying, and it wasn't like it was just any girl. It was Jade. The girl who was fresh out of a relationship, and who had only just become my friend. And I could have just ruined all of that in one stupid, drunken move. A stupid, drunken move that I had no idea why I had even pulled.

Except, when I looked back on said moment, I didn't exactly hate it. It's not like the way her lips were so soft against my own was a bad thing, or the way she didn't pull back was the worst experience ever. 

No, no, no. This is wrong. Tori, this is wrong. She literally told you about her trauma, then you do that an hour later? What the fuck. And, she's a girl, It couldn't have meant anything. You were just drunk. She was just drunk. When she wakes up and remembers this, your friendship is over.

But drunk actions are sober thoughts, right? No. No. No. There is no way in the world you have been thinking of her like that. 

But what if the entire reason I've been so desperate for her to like me all these years was for a reason? No. No. No. That has nothing to do with this, the reason why you want her to like you has nothing to do with anything like that. She's a girl, and not just any girl, she's Jade West, and you're also a girl. That is not how it is. She's going through a breakup, you don't like girls, it would be wrong for you to look at her that way. You don't look at her that way. Definitely have never ever looked at her in that way. 

I don't think.

Once I was finished pacing around and arguing with myself, I was pretty certain I no longer wanted to be in that house. I needed to be at home, on my own, away from everybody. And I needed a really big cup of water to try get rid of my hangover. I still had no idea where anybody actually was, and being totally alone right then was definitely not helping things much. 

I fumbled around in my jacket pocket for my phone, and thankfully, it was still there. I scrolled through my contacts, skipping past all of my friends, including Jade, until my finger was hovering over Trina's contact. I pressed ring, and awaited her answer.