𝗖𝗛𝗘𝗥𝗥𝗬 𝗕𝗟𝗢𝗦𝗦𝗢𝗠𝗦 | 𝘁𝗸 𝗼𝗻𝗲𝘀𝗵𝗼𝘁𝘀

bleeding roses

i can't. if i did, all the happiness i have now will be snatched away from me. and my happiness is taehyung. i don't want my taehyungie hyung snatched away from me.

those bad dreams... i can't remember any now, but they only bring sadness. some of them i can't forget, are the most saddening.

i want to stay awake and look at my sleeping hyung. and not fall into that cave of nightmares.

if i did, all the bad things would happen again.

no, i can't fall asleep. i should not.

but then, in one of the many blinks of my eyes, i wasn't able to open them again. one particular blink just pulled me to sleep without me knowing.

***

i found myself waking up with sweat dripping down my forehead, and the back of my head

i'll bear a monster choking me to death, in my sleep, but not this. my taehyungie cheating on me. that's absurd.

he would never!

vivid images came flashing in my mind.

the papers. the schedule. his name. numerous boys and girls' names. taehyung going out with different people on different days.

the smell of hospital that i can't really smell, but can only feel. the white walls and marble tiles.

the images flashed, occupying my vision, when i was slowly pulled off from my mind, as i heard shuffling beside me. my boyfriend was tugging on his pants, talking to someone on the phone, with the speaker on.

"doctor kim, mister park is here already."

"already? it's pretty early... alright, i'll try to reach soon, ask him to wait."

i heard the conversation, with a blank face. taehyung leaned down to my level, and pushed my bangs off my forehead, planting a soft kiss.

"i'm leaving to the hospital, my rose. take care."

"taetae... can I come along?"

taehyung bent down again, "baby, you know i'll be distracted. if a boy as cute as you is gonna stay with me while I work. remember, a doctor can not mess things up." taehyung joked, and i knew it's not the reason.

once he left, i felt shame covering my whole body, like a spreading fire. i asked if i could join taehyung, because i was insecure. insecurities come with lack of trust, sometimes.

how can i even think about my taehyungie cheating on me!? i felt ashamed.

i layed on our bed, as warm tears slid down my cheeks, running all the way to my ears. i wiped them off, and got up to do the usual routine.

to make it up to my taehyungie, i thought of making him something, maybe cookies? yeah. he loves cookies. i made them, and after taking my anti-anxiety pills, i went out of our place, to the hospital, to meet my doctor kim.

i know it's the break time, so i immediately ran to him. knocking the door twice, i saw someone walking past me. the pretty nurse gave me a soft smile, before greeting me.

they know that i'm his boyfriend. they're always so nice to me.

"come in!" i giggled, hearing my boyfriend's voice.

i went in, to see his surprised face. i laughed at him. he's too cute.

"baby?"

"yeah? came to give you some cookies."