can't kill a pogue 🫧 • jj maybank

9 - to my girls

i went upstairs and packed as much of mine and rori's stuff as i could in 15 minutes. i filled two backpacks and shoved them in the bottom of her pushchair before walking straight out of the frontdoor. i cannot believe rome said that to me. especially after everything we've been through together. i heard rome shouting our names but i refused to look back, if she really cared, she would've run after us. she didn't. jj left when i went upstairs to pack like i asked him to so i decided to go to the chateau. that's where he is most likely to be and i could do with some company right now.

rori babbled away in the pram as we walked to the chateau, i was trying to keep a brave face but it was getting harder and harder. i kept breathing slowly, flashing rori a smile every now and then when she looked up at me and luckily we got there quite quickly. we walked in and saw kie and sarah sat on the sofa. "hey rem!" they said at the same time and rori went and sat inbetween them. "hey guys" i replied. i knew i looked and sounded exhausted but it was only proved when they turned to each other with concerned looks on their faces.

i sat down and listened to them carrying on their conversation about something stupid. after a while, rori came and layed on me and fell asleep, thats when the girls turned to me. "remi, whats going on?" sarah asked softly, "yea, we've missed you" kie added, that was enough for me to break down for the second time that day. they came and sat next to me, one on each side. i told them the story and they comforted me in the best way possible. they just listened. it was exactly what i needed. by the time i'd finished ranting and they'd wiped my tears away, the boys had come back from whatever it was they were doing.

me and jj went and sat together on the hammock to have a chat. we spoke about what happened and he told me that whilst i isolated myself this week, his dad got arrested. he invited me to stay at his until his dad got out. it wouldn't be for very long considering luke always finds a way out but it was better than nothing. i was so grateful. i couldn't believe he would do this for me. i'd only lived in outer banks for about 3 weeks now but the pouges had opened their hearts and homes to me and rori and i couldn't be more thankful.

the girls offered to take rori whilst me and jj went and had some time which was nice of them although i think they just want us to get togther. we accepted anyway and went to the wreck. we grabbed a drink before going down and sitting on the beach. "i'm really sorry j." i began, "what? why?" he asked, "i was so preoccupied with everything happening with rome that i blanked you all and i wasn't there when you needed m-" i told him but was stopped when he pulled me in for a soft kiss. "never apologising for proritizing your family, its one of my favourite things about you" he said and we spent another hour on the beach. laughing, being stupid and kissing occasionally. well maybe abit more than occasionally.

a week later, i decided to go back to my house to grab some more things for me and remi. i was worried that rome would be there but i just wanted to get in and out as quick as i could. i walked over as i left my car on the driveway i did remember to bring my keys though, thank god otherwise she probably would've tried to steal it. i unlocked the door and walked inside. i went to the kitchen and saw a note on the side. it was a letter from rome.

to my girls,

my week away with josh made me realise how unfit i am to be your carer. i didn't even think about you both
once and that shows me that you need somebody better than me to look after you. i know you'll
think that this is selfish, and maybe it is but honestly remi you have been the responsible adult ever
since mum died. now you'll just have one less child to deal with.

me and josh have decided to move over to the mainland. i know we're moving quite quickly but it feels
right. i'll send you some money for bills, daycare, food etc monthly but don't forget i have a stash of cash in my wardrobe if
need be. please don't try and contact me, i need my space. i may come back and visit you guys, but not for awhile.

never forget how much i love you both.
romey xxx

i couldn't believe it. rome had left us. tears streamed down my face, i ran out of the house and got into my car. the letter still in my hand. i drove over to jj's house. i picked up rori and held her tightly, crying uncontrollably. jj came outside and ran over to me when he saw how upset i was. i put rori down and turned to jj. i wrapped my legs around his waist as he stroked the back of my head.