Past Love / English Version

First approaches

Together we cleaned up the living room a bit so that everyone had room in front of the TV, because we all wanted to watch a movie together. It will be a horror film in English with Korean subtitles, because that was the only film we had found with Korean subtitles. Lino, Han, Changbin, Lixie and Johanna sat on the sofa. Before Johanna sat Hyunjin, then came IN, Seungmin, Chan and I.

The five of us in front of the sofa had put the big mattress out of my bed here and everyone had a pillow and the blankets were shared. We had chips, a few other snacks for the movie and then it started. At first everything was fine, until a really creepy place came and I hid behind Chan without him noticing. Lino and Han saw this behind me and started giggling. Both got an evil eye from me and they stopped giggling, and I continued to watch the movie.

Chan leaned against the couch after some time, and my hiding place had disappeared. So I pulled my blanket over my nose and whenever something came that scared me, I pulled the blanket over my eyes. At some point, of course, Chan did notice it and slipped a little closer to me.

"Are you afraid?" he asked in a whisper and I nodded in agreement. He put his right arm around me and pulled me to him. "If a scene comes that you don't like, take my hand. You're not alone, okay?" he whispered in my ear and I could only nod in agreement. He put his left hand near me and when I got scared again, I took his hand and he pressed me protectively against him. Strangely enough, I wasn't so scared in his arms anymore and I felt very comfortable.

When the film was over, I saw that Lino and Han were snuggled close to each other sleeping. Lixie slept and had the sleeping Johanna in his arms. Everyone was asleep, except for Chan and me. I smiled and got up quietly and went into the kitchen because I needed some water. Chan followed me quietly and came with me into the kitchen. "Would you like something to drink, Channie?" I asked quietly, because I didn't want to wake the others. Chan nodded and I took a glass out of the cupboard and filled it with water.

I then gave the glass to Chan and our fingertips touched and I felt this tingling and familiarity again. He had to feel the same, because we were staring into each other's eyes again. After some time, I loosened the eye contact and took my glass to drink my water. Chan is watching me all the time. "Are you also coming to sleep when you're done watching?" I asked quietly and couldn't help smiling. Chan nodded and came out of his rigidity.

"Sorry, but I just feel a deep connection between us and I have to look at you to find out why I feel that way," he said quietly and came to me. He pulled me into a gentle hug. For a short time I was frozen, but I quickly relaxed and hugged him back. "Come on, let's go to sleep now," Chan said as he released the hug and gently pulled me with his hand towards the living room to the others. We lay down quietly and Chan pulled me closer to him and put his arm around me. Carefully, I slowly put my head on his chest and heard his fast heartbeat. Chan stroked my back and I fell asleep deeply and firmly at some point.