【Part 1: Revolution】「Satoshi」

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Chapter 1: Revolution

Tap tap tap tap tap. The keyboard tappings were honestly the most relaxing noises I've heard in some time. The disastrous chaos is over. I looked over to my small hook located in my cubicle. My keys hung there nicely. Kazuo's photo was hanging on it.

Everyone calls me foolish. They constantly ask me why I still gave a single shit about him. I loved him. No matter how cruel he has been. Even if he took Ita away from me, and my family. I couldn't hate him. I felt loved by him. Even though his love was possessive, and bizarre, I didn't care. I'm just as weird as he was.

"You may get off now." Shouta approaches me, and hands me back my files. "Thanks for doing this last minute. I really needed the prototype labels. Seiji will be pleased." He smiles a bit.

"Yeah, no problem." I've been accustomed to working at Raine. At first, I hated everyone, but now it has became relaxing. I guess this is my occupation, unless I find something else. I didn't hate it. I actually love drawing. I just knew Kyou wasn't fond of me, and Seiji was awkward towards me. I've accepted my wrong doings, and they both chose to forgive, but they won't forget. I guess that is the best resolution I can get for now.

I gathered my stuff, and left the office. The lady at the desk says her goodbyes, and I did the same. She was friendly, but was so clueless to the drama that the whole office was in. She would gossip with me from time to time. I enjoyed her company. The only thing that annoyed me was that I still didn't catch her name. I feared that if I asked, I would look bad, and because of that thought, I never bothered asking her.

I went back home to my apartment. It felt lonely. I lived alone. I wasn't fond of jumping into a new relationship after mine had passed away. I wished I saw him get buried. I wished I was there, but I wasn't even notified.

I tossed my suitcase on the couch, and poured myself some coffee. I needed to be awake. I wanted to stay up, and clean the house. It's been a while since I did that.

My dirty clothes laid all over the floor. I dropped to my knees, and covered my face. This was so painful. Living when Kazuo is dead. I wanted him back. Why was it so unfair? Kyou, and Seiji could be happy, but I had to suffer. I wanted Ita back. I wanted my parents back. I wanted everything.

I could feel my hot tears dripping out of the corners of my hands. I don't normally cry, so I felt an instant headache. This was the worst realization ever. My lover is fully gone.

"He's no good for you...." Ita's voice rung. I looked around, and saw him sitting on the couch. He smiles sweetly.

"Ita!" I cried, and crawled to him.

"Satoshi, don't cry. It doesn't suit your stupid face." He smiles sadly.

"I lost everyone. What did I do wrong? All I wanted was to be loved." My voice broke out.

"You didn't see the big picture. I loved you, but you chose to be with the wrong one." He sighs.

Ita's ghost haunts me every now, and then. He constantly kept reminding me how I made the wrong choice. I knew I did, but I followed what my desires wanted. I wanted Kazuo at all costs.

I banished the voices, and went about with my day. I saw all the hospital bracelets scattered on my couch. It hadn't been that long since I've been released from the asylum. I didn't even realize I was going insane until I saw visions of Ita all the time.

Losing everyone all at once took a toll on me. Staying at the asylum for a good three years has made me calmer. I didn't have the tendency to want to end my life anymore, and I felt like a new person. The only thing that still lingers in my soul is that I still do get depressed from time to time. I refused to go to a therapist since I was pretty much fed up with seeing doctor after doctor.

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