Ford Escort

19 - Homesick

Sunday morning came with the promise of an entire day to myself. A day without billionaire bosses or hot gardeners, a day to think, or maybe a day to avoid thinking at all. As I blinked myself awake in the afternoon sun, I was grateful I hadn't stuck around for that drink, even without it I had a pounding headache.

I squinted over at Ava's bed, only to see it empty, still littered with makeup and hair tools from the night before. I felt around for my phone, and checked it for texts from her. I knew she was a grown adult, more grown than me, but I couldn't help feeling concerned that she'd left with that Simon guy.

I only had one new text message, and it was from my mother. I ignored it and quickly tapped on Ava's contact, just as it started ringing the doorknob rattled and she stepped into the room.

"Are you calling me?" She asked, her shoes in her hands and her hair a deflated mess.

"Yes," I ended the call, "I just wanted to make sure you were safe."

"Oh we were." She winked, dropping her shoes and purse on the floor, pushing everything off of her bed and climbing under the covers.

"Ooh," I sat up, "Simon?"

"No, Eli."

I felt my heart drop into the pit of my stomach, I tried not to look disappointed but it was obvious I failed as Ava's grin disappeared and she sat up as well.

"Oh honey, I was joking. I'm sorry." Her face was painted with guilt, "I didn't think you'd actually believe me. I know you're into him, whether you admit it or not, I would never.."

I felt stupid for looking so heartbroken, there was no hiding my feelings from her now. The thought that he would've so easily just turned and slept with someone else had stung a lot worse than it should've if I'd successfully avoided catching any feelings. It was too late, he'd already seduced me.

"You're right." I admitted, "I like him."

"Then what the hell Roni?"

"I don't want a boyfriend right now." I explained, "It'll just make it that much harder when I leave."

"I get that, I do. But who's to say it would even last that long? Maybe you go on a few dates, get laid or at least get a hickey, and then maybe he'll lose his charm."

"That's a big maybe."

"Okay," I could see the cogs turning in her head, Ava was a fixer, "So then... consider of the other extreme. You give him a chance and he's perfect for you. Wouldn't you rather know for sure before you decide to move back across the country?"

"That's the thing though, Ava." I sighed, "I've already decided. I'm leaving."

"But.. what if you didn't." Her expression cracked, she became soft and vulnerable, "What if you just stayed? I know you want to drop out, but that doesn't mean you have to move back... You could give Maine a second chance."

"You said so yourself, Maine's not for me."

"Well what's so great about Sacramento that you can't wait to get back there?" Her tone shifted, her voice raising and her brow furrowing.

"My family, all my friends... everything I've ever known." I listed, noticing the hurt in her eyes as I said 'all' my friends.

"Alright, sorry I asked." She flopped down onto her pillow and turned her back to me.

"Ava," I groaned, "Come on. You're my friend too, I just... I'm homesick."

She remained still and silent, facing the wall. I let out a heavy sigh and stared down at my hands, my phone lit up again with another text from my mother.