Greykin Valley

| 81 | It Will Always Be Him

A look of utter astonishment slapped Wilson's face. "Why are you letting this guy get between us? You've known him for like a month, Jackson. What the fuck is a month next to our years?" he questioned, resentment in his voice.

"Because Damon's my mate!" he answered frustratedly. "How many times do I need to tell you?"

"Right, your mate," he grumbled and looked away again.

Jackson could feel his frustration evolving into anger. He wanted to snap, and something inside him was urging him to snap, but the last thing he wanted was to lose his temper. He exhaled deeply in an attempt to calm himself and calmly said, "Wilson, if our friendship meant nothing to me, I wouldn't be here trying to work through this. I love Damon, but I also love you—like a brother, okay? You're my brother; you always have been, and always will be. I don't wanna lose you, especially not now, but I can't...have you trying to kiss me or convince me that you're better for me than the guy I imprinted on."

Wilson didn't immediately answer. He looked like he wanted to interject several times, but he held back, and now that Jackson was finished, it seemed as though he didn't know what to say.

But Jackson waited. He stood there as the seconds ticked by, letting his friend process and think. However, he started to worry that he might have been too harsh, or that Wilson would think he didn't care, or that he just wanted to get rid of him to make his life easier. But that wasn't the case at all. If he could keep both his mate and best friend around, he would. The rest was up to Wilson.

The silence grew thicker with uncertainty, but after a few long moments, Wilson looked up at Jackson and frowned sullenly. "Why him, though? What did he do that made you decide you wanted to spend the rest of your life with him?" he asked hopelessly.

Jackson sighed and sat back down on the edge of the bed. "Because he just...I don't know. He gets me. Unlike everyone else around me, he didn't judge me for being who and what I am. He protected me, saved my life, and he came back for me when I was banished from his territory. He came back for me a bunch of times, actually. He helped me learn how to survive out here, and he makes me feel safe. He doesn't make me feel like all I'm good for is sex. He loves me, and I love him, and nothing you do or say is going to change that," he explained, and the more he said, the more he realized how much he really did love Damon; it made him realize how much his mate meant to him, and how much he'd done for him. And if now was the moment where he had to choose...he wouldn't hesitate to tell Wilson that it was and always would be Damon.

"I get you," Wilson mumbled despondently. "I never judged you. I protected you. What did he do different? What did I do wrong? I don't understand."

"You didn't do anything wrong, Wilson," Jackson said, shaking his head. "It's just...different. I told you; I've always seen you as my brother, and I still want you in my life...just not in the way you want."

A look of despair covered Wilson's face as he looked away again.

Jackson knew that look. He knew that his friend was trying to hold back tears. He wanted to comfort him, but he wasn't sure if Wilson would appreciate it right now, so he waited for him to reply.

"I'll never be good enough," Wilson lamented, his voice breaking. "And I guess that's gonna have to be okay, isn't it?" he sniffled, gradually turning his teary face to look at Jackson. "I mean I've already spent our entire lives watching you love other people, haven't I? It's nothing new. I'll get over it—I don't really have a choice in the matter."

As Wilson's despair grew, Jackson began to feel guiltier than ever. But he had to resist the urge to tell him he was wrong; he had to resist the urge to comfort him with lies. This was how it was, and he couldn't change that. "I'm sorry, Wilson," he said sadly, slowly moving his hand over his friend's shoulder. "But I really mean it; I still want you here."