larry stylinson one shots

that's when you're feeling it the most

⚠️TW:⚠️ self harm

-struggling to find a good description but yeaahhhh :/

--

the boys were all hanging out in the lounge of the tour bus, playing mario kart. louis was playing against liam, while harry sat silently next to him. he's had a feeling that just wouldn't go away for the last few hours, and it wouldn't go away unless he did something about it.

he really needed to do something about it.
the feeling and thoughts were so overwhelming, and he just couldn't take it anymore.

so, while louis was too distracted to pay attention to him, he slipped away to the bathroom and sat on the bathroom floor, by the cabinets.

what harry didn't hear, was niall question his disappearance-- "is harry okay? he seemed really off, and he just stormed to the bathroom."

"uh, i'll go check on him if he doesn't come back soon." louis says.

louis was very worried, because he also noticed how weird harry was acting, but he didn't want harry to feel like a child, or he had to be monitored constantly.

he knows about harry's struggle with self harm, and has always been there for support whenever he needs it. it honestly breaks his heart that someone as beautiful (inside and out) as harry feels the need to make himself feel pain. but he still loves him, and will do anything to make him feel loved and appreciated.

meanwhile, harry was desperately searching for the one thing that could ease his pain, the one thing that he could trust to always be there for him no matter what.

when he finally found it, he sat down on the floor of the tiny tour bus bathroom and took a breath. he knows it's not necessarily good for him, but it's the only thing that temporarily makes him feel better. that little portion of time when he feels euphoric is worth it.

he takes the sharp, silver blade and takes it to his arm, making one long, deep cut. he lets out a sigh of satisfaction as he makes a few more. the physical pain on his arm almost drowns out the pain he feels inside.

he's been in the bathroom for almost 15 minutes, and louis is even more worried now. he knows what's happening, and he needs to go and take care of it. he doesn't want his baby to hurt any longer.

"i'm going to go check on harry, you guys can play without me." louis says to the boys, standing up, walking out of the room.

as he gets closer to the bathroom, he can hear little sniffles that were so painful for louis to hear.

"hazza?" he says softly, "are you alright?"

at this question, harry lets out the most gut-wrenching sob, and that's when louis knows he needs to come in. so he does. louis opens the door (but not too fast or forceful) and is firstly met with the sight of red blood on the floor, before he even sees harry.

"oh, baby."

when he sees harry, his hair is no longer in the bandana it was in before, and his arm is nearly drenched in blood.

"hey, hey it's okay." louis says, sitting down on the floor close to harry. as soon as louis sits down, harry suddenly wraps his arms around louis' shoulders tightly, as if he's afraid louis will slip away. blood is getting all over his clothes, but that's the last thing on his mind right now.

harry sobs into louis' shoulder, while louis whispers comforting words in his ear, rubbing his back gently.

"how about we clean you up, hm?" louis asks, not letting go yet.

harry nods, but says, "just please don't let me go."

"i'll never let you go, harry."

louis slowly pulls away, but doesn't let go of harry's hand.

he slowly stands up, but when harry doesn't stand up with him, he bends back down and picks him up, walking him over to the toilet. he sets him down and doesn't let go of his hand, just like he promised.

he squats down on the floor in front of harry and gives his hand a kiss. "i love you, harry."

"i love you too, louis. very much."

louis stands up, running his other hand through harry's hair softly.

"was there a reason you did this, harry?" louis asks, getting the supplies to clean up harry's cuts.

"it was just one of those days when t-the feeling wouldn't go away. i-i had to." harry says, wiping his nose with his hand.

"aw, babe. if you have one of those days again, you can tell me, and i'll try my best to distract you and make you feel a bit better, okay?"

harry nods.

louis cleans and disinfects harry's cuts, all while still holding his hand.

he wraps his cuts in thick, white gauze, then kisses his forehead, reassuring him that everything will be alright.

"are you ready to go back with the boys, or do you need a minute?" louis asks.

"uhm y-yeah i'm ready, but can you get me a hoodie maybe? if they see my arm, they'll know what happened." harry says, looking down.

"yeah, of course babe. but, they boys would never judge you or ask questions okay?"

harry nods.

louis gives harry a forehead kiss before letting go of harry's hand to walk out of the bathroom.

"wait--" harry stops him before louis even steps out of the door, "can you get me one of yours please?" he asks timidly.

"i was already going to, haz." louis smiles, walking out of the bathroom.

what louis didn't see, was how fast the blood rushed to harry's cheeks, creating a flushed look on his face.

louis digs through his suitcase, trying to find his green adidas hoodie, because he knows that's harry's favorite. he loves the soft material, and the way it looks on him.

when he finally found it, he rushes back to the bathroom, not wanting to leave harry alone for any longer.

as soon as he gets back to the bathroom, harry immediately smiles.

louis puts the hoodie on for him, so harry doesn't have to use his arm too much.

harry looks so adorable and small in the hoodie, and louis can't help but swoon. "stoooop ittt." harry says looking away.

"i can't help it, babe. you just look too cute."

louis bends down and picks harry up, carrying him back to the lounge, and sitting on the couch next to niall.

at first, louis sits harry down next to him, but shortly after he does so, harry climbs onto louis' lap, straddling him and snuggling into his chest. louis rubs his back soothingly and holds him tightly.

all of the boys could make the inference of what happened, judging by the blood on louis' shirt, but they knew it was best not to say anything. but what they knew, was that harry needed comfort and love. so niall, liam, and zayn, gave eachother a knowing look and paused the video game.

one by one, each of the boys went and cuddled harry, making sure they knew he was loved.

--
hi, there! i know this was probably a bit sad, but i hope the end cheered you up haha!

i promise i'll try to write happier ones :)

i love youuuuuu <333

🤍