prince of ruin and gold - an oc story

4. runaway

This journal has become the only thing keeping me sane.

A few nights ago, I had what I'm sure was a wishful hallucination. I thought, for a brief moment, that Emile was there, in the room with me. I saw him reach out to me with wonder, say my name. When I blinked, he was gone.

It's official. I'm losing my mind.

I may not make it long enough to escape this place. It's already unwise to keep this journal, but if I don't get my thoughts out, I'll implode. I miss Earth so much, and I was only there for, what, a month? Two? It feels like years.

Then again, it feels like it's been years since I saw Emile's face, so maybe my perception of time is just fucked.

Emile and England aren't the only things I miss, though. I miss everyone. I miss Aria's informed optimism. I miss Evie's sage insights. I miss Theo's conversation, Robin's musical talents, Nico's pessimism. I even miss Albert, for Doreglin's sake. I'm clearly bonkers if I miss Albert.

Most of all, I miss my sister. When did she turn into this petty princess monster? My whole time here, she's been the epitome of bitch. Why don't I remember her this way? Was she always like this and I just didn't see it?

Over the time that I've been here, she's become even worse. Not only is she throwing disguised insults at me 24/7, she's also been sucking up to our parents even more than usual. I think they've noticed the change in her behaviour as well, and I also might've heard my mother and her in a screaming match.

I was fucking pumped.

Oh, I'm sorry, when did Orabella start deserving pity? I can tell you when she stopped deserving it: the moment she turned us in to my parents and took me away from my true home and my real family.

I say that I don't care about her anymore, but it's not true, no matter how much I wish it was. I can't stop caring about her, even though it seems like she's given up on me. I thought that when I pretended to become a leech, she'd be delighted, but now she's just worse in every way. Palace staff are starting to whisper about her, and my parents have started 'forgetting' to send someone to her room whenever there's a family meal. She's being iced out after years of undying loyalty.

Still, my family's petty problems are theirs, and I'm dealing with my own shit right now. For example: Lord Regretinot has been popping up in my day-to-day even more than usual, definitely on account of my parents. As if I wasn't already positioned to hate the guy, he also seems weirdly familiar, and I feel like I've seen him before, just in a poorer (and possibly more violent situation.

A good thing that's happened (you know, by crap standards) is that they're starting to trust me enough to go places on my own. I'm hoping that they'll eventually trust me with a device so that I can contact Taj. I think he knows that I'm here, since some media probably talked about my 'budding engagement to a mysterious Darkness prince'. Ugh. I'm sick just thinking about it. Hopefully I won't even have to wait for a call, Taj will just come by with some glass-shatterer or something and get me the fuck out of this place.

I'm waiting on you, Taj.

That same night, as if by magic, I went up to my room early after finishing my food faster than usual. Orabella was her usual petty self, and I'd become used to calling her Orabella rather than 'Bell' or 'dear sister'. It was becoming easier to say the names I hated with practice.

The one name I couldn't say without flinching was my own.

Each night was still the same: ceaseless crying and pillow-hugging. The ghostly encounter with Emile still had me spooked, and I'd been desperate for reasons why it could have happened.

Most likely, I was insane, but there was another, less plausible, answer. Emile could've drunk dream water and seen me in his dreams. I read that dream water just teleports your consciousness to the place you want to go, and if the place he wanted to be was with me, the dream shield could've ripped slightly. The universe gave me a tidbit of Emile to tide me over, and it was working. The leftover joy from seeing the boy I loved was keeping me going.

The Light Dimension was not the place I had in mind to realise I was in love, but desperate times...

Anyway, that night was the night I escaped. I came into my room after the usual oversized tip to Lester, and once the door closed, I started to go into my old routine before pausing at the bathroom door. I whipped around to see the window shattered, a note left on the chest of drawers.

Vil,

Meet me at the hideout.

Taj

I know. It seemed like a trap to me too, but as I reread it over and over, I realised that I didn't have much to lose anyway. If I climbed out that window and Taj was actually the one who'd shattered the glass, I was free as a bird. If it hadn't been him, I could easily hide the fact that I was trying to escape by using some noble excuse.

Quickly, I packed a bag. There wasn't much to take. I grabbed my journal out from the bottom of the mattress and tossed it into a satchel along with multiple golden chalices. I knew that the more things I took with me, it would be harder to prove my own innocence, but I couldn't help it. These stupidly ornate cups were about to actually help me for the first time in my life, and I chuckled at the prospect.

After I had changed into the clothes I'd come to the palace with, tying the pink shred of hoodie around my neck, I swung the bag onto my shoulder and climbed down the painted-gold trellis that laid on the outside wall. I looked around quickly, checking for anything that could harm me before running off into the forest. I knew my way on foot anywhere within a five-mile distance, and was about to make a dash to Taj's hideout before I realised.

There was somewhere I had to go first, somewhere I wasn't sure I could skip. The one place that held the answers I was looking for.

After running for what felt like a really long time, I arrived, sweating and panting, at the Temple of Golden Worship.