His Sunshine

Chapter Twenty Four.

It was the first day back since winter break. I had been staying at home for the past three days since my father had begged me to. We hadn't discussed my outburst the other day, and we certainly hadn't discussed the part about me liking boys.
He had gone back to his routine of sitting on the couch all day. It seemed as though he had dismissed my entire accusation, and decided not to get a job.
Though I had managed to scrape enough money up for the powerbill, he didn't acknowledge it.

It was the second week of January, we graduated the third week of May. Roughly four months left of this hell.

Chicago was waiting for me when I arrived to our class, but today he wasn't reading.
"No books today?" I inquired, looking around before giving him a quick kiss and sitting down.
He shrugged, "Read them all."
With a doubting smile, I sarcastically asked,"You've read every book in the world?"
Chicago rolled his eyes, "No, every book that I have though."
"Then we'll just have to get you more, won't we?"

We continued in light conversation, our hands untangling themselves from each other when people began to show up.

Today, the guidance counselor was to call the seniors into her office one by one to discuss our 5 year plan.
Which was great, because I didn't have one.
I got called during fourth period, nerves piling up on my chest as I had no idea what I was going to tell her.

"Afternoon, Mr.Summers." She greeted, motioning me to sit at the chair in front of her.
I gave a kind smile, "How are you, Mrs.Mayfield?"
She tucked a piece of her long, brown and blonde curly hair, the kind that coiled up into rings, behind her ear. "I'm doing very well, thank you. How are you?"
"I'm good." I said shortly.
And so the dreaded meeting began. She asked where I saw myself next year, and the following years after that.
I sighed, "I gotta be honest with you, Mrs.Mayfield. I have no idea what I'm going to do."
She gave me an easy smile, one of sympathy. "That's arlight, thats what I'm here for. Do you have any interests that could help you make a decision?"
I shook my head, "Nothing of use."
"That's where we disagree. I saw in your file that you took some photography classes at your last school? Can you tell me about that?"

I didn't let any hope go to my head, the chances of me being successful in that field was severely lacking.
"Uh–sure. I love photography, but that's not very realistic. I mean, how do I even start that?"
Mrs.Mayfield hummed, "Well, there are a few local companies that are looking for young photographers for a different eye of things. Now, I'm not sure if they are paid internships or not, but I can give you their contact info, if you'd like?"
I hesitated, nodding. "Yeah, yeah, okay. I'll give it a shot."
"So, you don't plan on going to college?" She questioned as she grabbed a notepad and pen, scribbling emails and numbers of companies.

"No, I don't have the money for it and I don't do anything that could get me a scholarship." Truthfully, it did sadden me that I couldn't get the college experience. Study what I love, meet new people. But I simply couldn't go.
Mrs.Mayfield shook her head, "You could absolutely go to school on a photography scholarship. I can help you apply for one if you come back to my office tomorrow during lunch."

Without my approval, hope had found its way into my mind. Maybe I could go to college, maybe I could be a photographer and maybe it could all work out.
I didn't tell Chicago, not wanting him to get excited for me and then pity me when it didn't work out.
And that's when the lying started.

I had gotten a paid internship at one of the photography companies, Pictures and Paint, they worked with all sorts of visual artists. When I told Chicago I was going to work, which he thought was the camera shop, I was actually going to the Pictures and Paint factories where some days I would have a model that I would get to design a style for and photograph.
It brought in a good bit of money, my pictures had gotten decently popular online and within the company.
Models were on waiting lists to work with me, the pure feeling of people being desperate for me allowed the job to consume me.

"How was work?" Chicago asked me once I walked into his house. He greeted me with his arms wrapped around my neck and a kiss on the lips.
I smiled, "Boring, but I made it out alive."
He smiled, kissing me once more before he stepped away but kept his arm wrapped around mine.
"I wanted to ask you something." He said, sitting down on the couch. I sat beside him, letting his legs fall into my lap.
My heart was beating semi fast, worried that he had figured out that I was lying about my job. I don't even know why I was lying, I guess I was just waiting for the other shoe to drop. Everything was too good right now. I had a good job with good money, my Dad had been finally getting out of the house and looking for his own work opportunities.
Chicago and I..whatever we were.. were good.
I was waiting for the day that the company called me and fired me.

But what he had asked surprised me.
"I wanted to ask if you wanted to join The X's." He hummed, watching my face carefully to look for a reaction.
I probably looked puzzled at first, because I was. "You want me to join your gang?"
He shrugged, "You already have a jacket, you could join officially. Only if you wanted to–obviously."
A smile found its way to my lips. "Would I have to get a tattoo?"
"I could probably find a way to get you out of that." Chicago's fingers played with mine.
"No, tattoos are badass." I murmured, pulling him onto my lap.
His hands cradled my face as he kissed me. "So, you will?"
I clicked my tongue, "Is there some kind of initiation thing?"
"You'll have to compete in a car race and win, but with my car you'll do great."

I furrowed my brows, "I don't know..."
"Just think about it, okay?"

So I did. I had ridden in his car before around the track, surely he could teach me how to race with it. But even then, the chances of me crashing and burning were high.