His Divine Love

3: Hard Goodbye

"Ohh God she looks so beautiful. How am I going to control myself?", he thought and hurriedly locked the chain as her bare neck tested his patience. He now needs to take a cold shower to control himself as he knows if he stays with her for a long then he will lose himself. He can't touch her inappropriately and here his mind is filled with wild thoughts. She and her fragrance are forcing him to lose self-control.  They were never this close ever and now he is finding her tempting hot.

Her partially exposed bare shoulder annoyed him, so he gently pushed her dress off her shoulder and moved her dupatta aside so he could see her skin. He swallowed when he saw her neck luring him and she was arousing him without even realizing it. He is eager to explore her, but he can not move too quickly because, to him, she still seems like a little child. He considers her a child because she is only 24 years old and he wants to give her time to fully understand everything, as well as because she is too young to handle him. Especially his work, which is risky because one mistake could result in his death. Because he is a feudal lord with many responsibilities and a tendency to lose his cool under pressure, they always carry guns for protection. Despite the fact that they only have a three-year age difference, he finds her too fragile to touch. He still wants her to melt under his touch. He did not notice when he moved his lips to her shoulder and kissed her back, making her shudder.

"Murtasim..." she said in a soft voice, bringing him out of his reverie. He turned to face Meerab and saw her red cheeks and closed eyes. He hummed and asked what she wanted, to which she replied, "I need time. We just got married, so can I borrow sometime?" she asked. He instantly left her, remembering that she had previously asked for time from him. He felt ashamed of himself for letting go of his composure after breaking his promise to her and talking about his likes and dislikes earlier. His body acted desperate when he should have waited for her to get comfortable, so somewhere his harmones are to blame..

"Sorry. I thought you are comfortable",he said and took a step back

"Lagne or hone mai fark hai Murtasim", Meerab whispered and pushed her hair back. She felt ashamed to stop her husband from exercising his right, so she cast a downward glance, but was there anything else she could have done? She wants to fulfill her dreams before anything else, even though she is aware that she is married. She wants to give herself time to fall in love with him because she is heard from her friends that love weakens us. His touch looked strange right now, and she was not sure if she would be able to resist falling for him. She was nervous and got goosebumps thinking about someone kissing her neck or approaching her like she had seen in movies. She married solely for her parents, so she is uncomfortable with anything like that and needs time for everything marriage-related. She finds everything associated with love and intimacy uncomfortable, even though his touch has never made her feel uncomfortable.

In an attempt to control his developing feelings for her, Murtasim excused himself at this point and dashed to the washroom for a cold shower. He is aware that she is not yet at ease with him and that, in order to proceed, he must create a welcoming environment for her. However, he acted as a jerk a while ago. Feeling helpless in love, he closed his eyes as he stood beneath the shower. It has been a long twelve years since he fell in love with her as a child. At the age of 15, he developed feelings for her, and now he is 27. He used to watch movies at that time and believed that love was like a fairytale, but he never had the courage to approach her. Keeping his eyes close to himself, he put his hand on the wall and considered how he could make her feel at ease in his presence while also offering an apology.

"Oh, Allah, how could I lose my patience. I was trying to get away from her. How could I kiss her like that? God, why are you making things so hard for me? How am I going to tell her how much she means to me if she thinks I am a cheap guy? In front of her, I want to present a positive and distinct image. I can not lose her, and I can not even stop her from going because it is important to her. I can not act like a villain if she wants to study," he thought to himself. Drops of water descended upon his body, causing his desires to subside and relieving him of tension.