N.F.L Imagines

open when... part two (justin fields)

because of my downtown apartment, i was able to run over to the coffeehouse that y/n said she would meet me at.

the entire (speed) walk over there i was focused on blocking out the anxiety i was feeling. it was so strong i didn't even feel the cold hitting my face. it was snowing and even with my hat and jacket, i definitely would've been freezing if it weren't for the thoughts of y/n in my mind.

even when i haven't seen her in years, she still managed to bring a sort of warmth to my life.

distracted by my thoughts, i didn't see the person walking out of the parking garage to my right.

"i ask you out for coffee and you ignore me?" i heard someone say, seemingly to me, and i quickly turn to look at them.

my eyes fall on her. the girl that got me through university. the girl who understood me like no one else did. the girl that always put everyone before herself. the girl who was standing before me, bundled up in a hat, gloves, and a giant jacket because she could never stand the cold.

without thinking i quickly came up and engulfed her in a hug, definitely lifting her off the ground.

"oh okay, i missed you too." she said to me, bringing her legs to wrap around my waist and her arms around my neck like she used to do all the time.

"i missed you so much. i'm so sorry" i said, burying my face in the hair around her neck.
"i know you're sorry, but you know what i'm proud of you for being able to call me and meet with me." she spoke, her hand moving to the back of my head, on top of my hat. even though she had every right to be mad at me, it wasn't surprising that she still had a way to say something positive.
"thank you for meeting with me too, that couldn't have been easy. especially cause i didn't bother to call for four years." i removed my face from her neck and finally looked her in her eyes.

the same beautiful, sweet eyes that got me through a lot of shit.

"honestly, j, it was easy. how could i have passed on seeing you again, talking to you, and obviously making you pay for my coffee." she joked.

she could always make situations lighthearted like that, which i appreciated because highly emotional situations were difficult for both of us.

"i definitely will." i could feel one tear come out of my eye.
"don't get tearful, baby, cause then i will too" she said, wiping my cheek with her gloved finger. i obviously didn't miss the old pet name she called me.
"alright, let's go inside too because i'm starting to lose feeling in my feet." i said, she nodded in response and i set her back down and we walked hand-in-hand to the front door.

after we ordered our drinks we decided to sit on a window seat with a table attached. after she set her coffee on the table, she took off her gloves.

i guess a part of me was hoping to see the same ring i gave her still on her finger, but i should've known that no one would keep a ring on from their ex for years.

"i still have it" she said, taking a sip of her coffee.
"the ring?"
"mhmm, i did think about selling it for rent money, but i never did. one of the last things i still have that you gave to me. i couldn't give it away no matter how much i wanted to." she looked down at the absence of jewelry on her left ring finger.

without words, i reached down to grab her hand and placed my lips on the same place i had that christmas years ago. she interlocked our fingers together and placed them in her lap.

"i found the letters you wrote me. they were really amazing, and i just feel really bad for forgetting about them. and you. there was just a big empty hole in me when we broke up and i think it was just easier for me to forget the pain than address it. that's what i regret the most because i know i couldn't live without you, so i just distracted myself until i broke down in my closest." i opened up to her, not having enough courage to look her in the eye.