─ trials of athena ; jjk

─ 11. the adventure of resting bitchface, miss deepthroat & beaver nugget

My brows drew together, damn, where do I know her from? This is going to bug the shit outta me if I don't figure it out.

I took in her features; long pale hair, golden skin, bright green eyes, legs that seemed to go on for miles — Wait. Mile long legs? I swear you could hear my stomach dropping at this point.

"JK!"

Sonofthevirginmary.

Nofuckingway.

Miss Deepthroat? I'd recognize those legs of hers anywhere.

Damn, hadn't seen her the day I saw my beaver nugget of a neighbor bring her back to his evil lair and choked her on his pierced dick.

I'm gonna be real as fuck right now, I'm surprised she wasn't in the hospital after that wild ride.

I winced, sympathy rushing through my veins at the pain she must have felt the morning after. But the pain must've been bearable, since this woman looks like she's in for a round two.

RIP Miss Deepthroat's pussy. 

JK jerked his head to peer at the woman that had stopped at his side, who was sexily biting at her lower lip while twiddling at the edge of her short skirt. Her sultry eyes had yet to fall on me, but when they did, they turned as sharp as a freshly sharpened blade.

Oh fuck that.

I ain't dealing with this bitch looking at me like that.

I raised a curious brow and stepped away from JK, who was nearly pressed against me.

I awkwardly stood there, third wheeling, hoping the good lord would hear my pleads and just strike me out of this world.

JK arched a single pierced brow, looking unfazed and a little clueless while he looked at the women. "Do I know you?"

Oh my fucking god.
He did not.

Not only did her fuckin' jaw drop but so did my fuckin' jaw.

I awkwardly whistled to myself, swaying on my feet and keeping my gaze off the two. I might have done this to fight the urge to snicker.

Did he really fuck so many other women that he couldn't recognise the women he slept with two weeks ago or was he just too drunk to remember?

Miss Deepthroat blubbered her reply, big pitiful eyes welling with crocodile tears when she looked at a confused JK. He shot a look at me and wrapped his fingers around my forearm to stop me from leaving.

A quiet hiss left my lips at his touch – and I was trying to tell myself that it wasn't appropriate to grab his hand and suck on his fingers. I may get a cut on the inside of my mouth from all the rings he wore on his fingers...but he fuckin' killed me with those hands.

Who knew Athena Jayden Fuckin' Green had a hand fetish? Just for my dickhead neighbor, it seems.

My traitorous body trembled when his thumb rubbed across the skin of my inner arm. A scoff left my lips and I jerked my arm away from his hold as a way to not feel the things he did to my body, unknowingly, without my permission.

"...d-don't you r-r-remember, JK?" Miss Deepthroat sniffled, breaking down in the middle of the fuckin' supermarket. My brows rose near my hairline at the pathetic act. Don't get me wrong, I felt bad for the woman, but c'mon.

JK rolled his neck, annoyance flashing in his eyes, "Care to refresh my memory?" he drawled, his shoulder muscles rolling underneath the white t-shirt he wore.

Miss Deepthroat dried her tears and popped her blinged out hand on her hip and glared – switching moods so fast it nearly gave me whiplash. "Two Weeks ago. You picked me up at the bar in town, took me home, I sucked your dick and called you daddy as you fucked my ass from behind." she stated, flicking her blond tresses over her shoulder.

So he's an ass man? Well, fuck me sideways.

During this serious moment, me being me ( the best person EVER ), an unladylike snort escaped my lips. Both of them turned towards me and I couldn't hold it in anymore. Laughter left my lips to the point where I balanced my hands on my knees to hold myself upright.

"I'm sorry," I took control of my laughter while chuckles left my lips, "This is like watching a reality TV show." I cleared my throat and my face went blank once more. "Continue. I don't have time to pick up any popcorn – but I do have this!" I victoriously held up a stick of gum I put in my pocket before JK dragged me to his car this morning. "Go on, continue! You were just getting to the good part!" I clapped my hands, throwing the gum in my mouth.

They watched me, mostly in disbelief until Miss Deepthroat took a step towards JK and pressed her body against his side.

I wanted to frown at her closeness – but then I remembered; I was supposed to loath his existence, not grow envious of her closeness to him.

JK snickered lightly at my display and stepped away from the women.

"Is this your new bitch?" She said, snorting like a pig. I screwed up my face and raised a single brow. "And whose funeral are you going to?" she asked, lip curling up, looking at my all black clothing; which consisted of a black tank tucked into black shorts with black fishnets underneath. My shiny black combat boots – that reminded me of JK's completed outfit.

I shrugged, looking around the area, smacking on my gum. "Haven't decided yet," I withheld a grin at the queasy look on her face and amusement on JK's, "But talk about my clothes again, and it'll be yours."

"C'mon, it was a joke." I said lightly when I saw the fear on her face, "You know, I try not to laugh at my own jokes, but we all know I'm hilarious."

JK sighed heavily, seemingly tired of this conversation. He ruffled his hands through his hair and looked down at the woman trying to push herself on him.

"Look," he spoke deeply – voice not sounding as soft when he was speaking to me ( and I was fuckin' smug of that fact, too ), "I'm sorry. But we agreed on one night–." he said kindly.

Miss Deepthroat reared back, "Please–JK–"

"For fuck's sake," I sighed and gave her a kind smile, "Girl, lemme just tell you bluntly what he's trying to say. But I'll tell you a little story first — Did you know when a male octopus finds a mate, he rips off his penis–" from the corner of my eye, I saw JK groan and bash his head against the top shelf – lucky bastard, at least he can reach the top shelf. "—and throws it to the female so she can inseminate herself. Then the male grows a new dick. If that isn't the most EPIC way to tell someone to scram and go fuck themselves? Well, that's what he's telling you."

Miss Deepthroat stopped and cradled her chin, "...not gonna lie. Makes sense. He should just grow some balls and tell me outright."

"Nah, girl. Balls are weak and sensitive. If you wanna be tough, grow a pussy. Those things can take a pounding." Miss Deepthroat and I snickered. JK, the poor man he was, looked like he was seconds away from leaving us.

"Thanks girl, I owe you one – you got one hell of a resting bitchface, not gonna lie; I respect that." Miss Deepthoart said, holding out her fist. I bumped mine against hers. "We should meet up one day and get lunch."

"Sounds good. Just hit me up when you wanna hang." I waved my fingers in her direction as she turned and left.

JK stared at me in wonder, and finally looked at the cart and sighed.

"What has my life come to?" He mumbled and I couldn't help but agree.

I'd been asking myself that question since I met him.

a/n ;

it took me forever to get this all written down due to how hard I was laughing, lol. But I hope you like the chapter and lemme know what you think!
some of the quotes in the chapter I found on Pinterest and tweaked them a bit to fit my aesthetic!