spiderman angst/sickfic oneshots

merry sickmas! autistic peter / meltdown

He felt like crying.

And no one noticed until he started sobbing, bringing his arms over his ears and shutting his eyes tight, and just wailing. He couldn't hold it back anymore. He couldn't deal with Tony and Thor accidentally bumping into him, he couldn't deal with processing every conversation at once, he couldn't deal with all the smells and the lights, and it all came pouring down. He was melting and he couldn't hold it back anymore.

Tony tried to grab his attention by rubbing his back, knowing he made a mistake when Peter sprung off the couch.

The room was silent now.

Peter began shaking out his hands, trying to process what was happening, and then realized everyone was staring at him and ran for his room.

Tony cursed before getting up to follow him.

"I believe young Peter is overwhelmed by our noise." Thor reasoned.

Bruce nodded, "I forget he has a lot of sensory issues."

"Is he.... What's the word..." Cap started, genuinely searching for the right term, one that wasn't used much in his generation.

"Yes, he's autistic." Bruce piped in, "On top of the sensory issues he already had though, his powers gave him even more powerful input, and he has a lot of trouble processing it all. He actually fights with his vision slightly impaired in his suit so he doesn't get overstimulated as easy."

"we fucked up." Bucky mumbled.

-----

Down the hallway, Peter was in full on meltdown mode. He was pacing and sobbing and trying not to feel everything he was feeling, but it wasn't working. The lights were too bright and every time his clothes touched his skin it was painful. Every brush sparked a rash-like pain and he wanted to tear his clothes off and then gouge his eyes out.

He collapsed against a wall, rocking and shaking out his hands. He wanted everything in his world to freeze, but he couldn't. He wanted silence and comfort but it hurt. Everything was too much and he couldn't breath. He let out another hard sob, snot falling down his face and mixing with salty tears.

A second later, someone was in front of him.

"Peter, Peter listen to me-" Tony began softly, holding one of Peter's presents in his hand.

"Go away!" He shouted through his tears. Hyperventilating afterwards.

"No no, hey. Breathe, kid. Li-" Tony tried again, but was interrupted for a second time.

"Shut up!!" He yelled, bringing his hands over his ears instead of shaking them out and rocking harder, nearly hitting his head into the wall. He felt out of control, he couldn't stop hearing and seeing and feeling everything and it was miserable.

Tony ripping open a present and then a box in front of him only made him ball up further, but right before he could stick his head in his knees, Tony slipped something over his ears, very carefully moving Peter's hands away.

The second the device was over his ears, everything went silent. Peter snapped up, his tears suddenly stopped and replaced with shock and intrigue.

He had never felt so relieved in his life.

He uncurled and sprawled out against the wall, letting his sweaty body air out. He had no words. He was so extremely exhausted. He closed his eyes and relished in the silence, his heart rate finally slowing and his breathing evening out.

When he opened his eyes again, Tony was sitting next to him, he motioned for him to feel the buttons on the side.

He began clicking them. One made a soft white noise, the next one made Friday say hello, letting him know she was connected to the headphones wherever he needed her, acting as a sort of Google or Alexa, and the next button made everything different volumes.

One press a quarter volume of normal, and the next a little louder at half the the volume of normal.

"Can you hear me?" He heard Tony say, the voices down the hall barely audible.

He nodded.

"I'm sorry we overwhelmed you. Do you want to sit in your bedroom with the lights dim or off for a while?" Tony offered.

He nodded again.

Tony stood up and offered Peter a hand, surprisingly he took it. And then, unexpectedly, Peter attacked the man in a hug. He didn't have the strength to speak, he didn't have the words. On Tony's back, Peter spelled out letters

First: S O R R Y

"It's okay, bud. I know stuff like this happens, and I know you were overwhelmed. Happens to the best of us, I forgive you." Tony responded, knowing Peter was referring to the yelling and the meltdown in general.

Second: T H A N K Y O U

Peter knew these headphones were specially made for him. He knew Tony had probably worked for hours figuring out a way to make a pair of noise cancelling headphones that would get past all of his super senses. It didn't fly over Peter's head the soft, comfortable material the headphones were made with either. Every single detail was thought out and applied and Peter had never been more thankful in his life.

"You're welcome, kid."

----

Peter went to his room for a while, and later, with his headphones on at half volume, went to finish Christmas with the avengers.

And though he was nonverbal through the whole thing, Peter smiled more than he had in a very long time.

Merry Christmas

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OMG merry Christmas ppl
Hope all of the ppl who celebrate had a nice holiday