Koh-e-Noor

//• satrah •//

[idhar ka hi hoon naa udhar ka raha
safar ka hi tha main safar ka raha]

"Ouf! When leaving the house, you were on the verge of tears. Now, you've been talking my ear off for three straight hours."

"Aur woh bhi khushi mein! Yeh bhi tou include karo? You know, main jab maroun gi na, I want to be remembered as the most khush person on this planet. If beinteha khubsoorti and beinteha khushi had a face, it'd be me. Aur agar aise meri maut naa huyi tou meri tarapti aatma waapis aaye gi aur iss zameen pe kisi ko chain nahin lene de gi."

"What nonsense."

"Sorry? Tumhain passenger seat di maine, oopar se shugal lagaya hua hai, yeh kaise baat kar rahe ho tum mujh se? Mere baggeir mar rahe the tum uss ghar mein. Do din aur naa aati main tou dukh mein skeleton ban jaana tha tum ne."

"Driving seat maine di tumhain taras kha kar, woh bhi ghalti se—"

"Tsktsktsk—"

"Hamza mujhe drive karne dou please, please. Itni haseen raat hai, itna khubsoorat mausam hai, mera pyaara mulq hai, kyaa pataa mujhe yeh mauqa phir kab mile, tumhaare lafz nahin yeh? Ghante ke andar kaise lehje badal lete hain log."

She shrouds her gaze, "Pehla lafz bhi mera nahin."

A subtle eye roll conveys my sentiments, "Aur main mar raha tha? Tumhare baggeir? When did you hallucinate this? Main tou—"

Right after saying it, I realize how big I fucked up. I slowly turn to her, dreading the look on her face.

She has her brows narrowed, not hurt but slightly upset.

"You know it slipped. I wasn't saying—"

"I don't care what you think of me."

In my mind, I wear a pair of boxing gloves and hammer the punching bag with all my might.

"Listen, never before have I said anything about it, why would I now? Now that you are on the driving seat, in control of the car on this dangerous road?"

She rolls her eyes playfully, a bit relieved, "Might as well shift to the fifth gear, direct it towards a hill and roll out of the car and blame it on my hallucinations." she gasps, "You know... I'm hearing a voice?" she widens her eyes in panic, "Oh no... Ya Allah, it's telling me to do exactly that. It's forcing me. It's taking over my conscience— Listen, I'm sorry, I can't—"

"Shut up," I squeeze her hand when she reaches the gear.

The ice cold hand worries me more, "You are fucking freezing you dumbass? Leave the seat and let me drive." I pull her to me.

"No, there's so little left, like forty minutes, let me drive please, please."

"Right. Good girl, that's the correct tone. But wear some gloves, how do you make these numbing frozen hands work? Look at how white they are, it's terrifying!"

She pulls the piece of ice out of my hold, "The cold never bothered me anyway."

I shake my head at her stubbornness, unable to imagine how she functions. "This is unbearably cold. I live in the New York City, I've been to colder places, I've never had such unforgivingly frozen hands. Listen to me for once, let me drive while you heat up your hands."

"Just a bit more. I can't stop the car here,"

A moonlit highway stretches ahead, the headlights of our car being the only cure to this darkness.

Until she makes me notice the twinkling stars overhead.

While she is enthralled by the splendor around her, the conversation that accidentally arose seeps in the cage of my mind.