Still Searching

And All That We have Written Lives in Our Skin

Techno was having a good day, even if Tommy made him do an embarrassing dance with a mop. But Tommy's eyes reminded him of his begging sister. She would use the same look to ask for cookies and cuddles. Sweet to be sure. Then comes walking in Dream. He is nothing like a dream, just a nightmare. And a recurring one at that. Techno barely manages to hold back a sigh when he stands in his usual stance.

"Hello, how is it down here?" Dream asks.

Why is he even bothering? Just go away already. Techno wants to say but instead he gives the response his superior wants to hear. Better than trying to explain everything else in his head. "It's fine, he hasn't acted up or seem to be too damaged. I think the fight made him scared of us now."

"That's good, it will make it easier for the scientists." He smiles. "Speaking of which, I heard that the scientists coming from Earth are arriving tomorrow." Dream looks thoughtfully at the wall. It's a good thing too because Techno's emotions show. His chest stops moving with his breath and his eyes widen. But it's only for a moment, then Dream turns back to him, and it's like Techno is carved from white marble.

"That's good, will I still have to guard-" Tommy he is about to say. "-it?"

"I believe so but we'll see how the scientists feel about that. They usually don't like anyone in their lab." He rolls his eyes.

"Thank you for the update sir," he salutes.

"Well, get back to it. I'll be back down to show the scientists their new play thing when they arrive." He waves his hand about and walks into the elevator. The door takes longer to close, at least, in the eyes of Techno's it does. There goes the day. The day he was enjoying. He knew it was going to happen, he knew that they would eventually get here. Why is he so surprised? He knew. He turns to see Tommy's smiling unaware face but that drops quickly when he sees Techno's expression.

"What's wrong?" Tommy finally asks. Techno doesn't want to answer, it'll hurt him. And Techno wants to protect him from it all. He takes a painful swallow of spit that feels more like a rock going down his throat.

"The scientists from Earth are going to be here tomorrow." Techno explains with lack of air in his lungs. He dares to look up from the floor to see Tommy looking at the tiles beneath him. His expression is what he imagines himself with. He's so broken. Almost human. Techno kneels in front of the cell where Tommy sits. Tommy grabs onto Techno's shirt.

"Please Techno get me out of here. I don't know if I can take it!" Tommy clenches his fists more, sobbing. "Please, please please-" It makes Techno want to cry too. He's almost cried a few times since being in Hoku, but always stops himself. He doesn't want anyone to know he's weak. But this almost breaks him. "Please-I can't-"

"I-I can't I-" Techno can't, if he does there's no going back to Earth. To his sister. Even if this boy doesn't deserve it. But... If he does let this go, will he be able to look at his sister without shame? Will he feel just as sick about missing Tommy like the way he thinks about his sister now? Will he be at peace when he's safe? Tommy whips away his tears, leaving Techno's shirt wrinkled, and Tommy replaces his somber look for an angrier one. This makes Techno withdrawal.

"I guess friend means something else on Earth." Tommy wraps his arms around his legs, which are close to his chest. His head is turned away and it makes Techno's heart hurt in a new way. He hates this. It would have been so much easier if he didn't think of him as something more than an animal. Yet, Techno let it happen. Because he's weak. He hates being weak but that's all he is. At least... In this way he is. He wishes he was stronger in the heart than physically. If his heart was as strong as his body, he wouldn't have to worry about a thing.