asylum [kai parker] editing/rewriting

Thirty-Seven

What do I have to defend myself? I could convince the judge that if I told anyone, Kai would've killed me. I'm not sure if it's true but the judge doesn't know that. Agent Cage doesn't know that either.

Once I am upstairs I throw on a pair of skinny jeans, ones with pockets. They're not as tight as they used to be. I can't help that, though. I'm glad I am still alive. Kai could have gave me nothing and starved me, but he didn't. We ate, but traveling on the run spares little time for McDonald's.
Pushing those thoughts aside, I pull on a plain black long sleeve sweater and tie my hair up in a messy pony-tail. I like the look. I'm not trying to look like a slob, and the outcome isn't that bad. For the first time in a long time I like what I see in the mirror. I have time to put a little make-up on, but I don't really care for that sort of thing.

But something I do surprises me. I've been trying to blend in and fall into my own habits once again, but I don't even think twice before sliding my green contacts in and blinking three times to even them out. I sure as hell didn't expect a tear to fall, but one did. Emotions flood through me when I look at myself in the mirror. Memories of worn down motel rooms and smelly gas stations float to mind. I don't even push them back. I smile.

It is the first time I have smiled in a while. It is true, and genuine.

My backpack strap slides perfectly into the crook between my shoulder blades as I exit the bathroom. I make my way down the steps, grabbing my black army boots and sliding them over the tight jeans. But before I can walk out the door, my arm swings back and grabs my black-rimmed glasses off the counter. I don't need them. My vision is good. But that isn't why I am wearing them after all.

The bus passes by, slowing down towards the end of my long driveway. I wave it off, deciding to walk anyway. My fingers dip into the pocket of my backpack to pull out a set of earbuds and my old phone.

Teenagers by My Chemical Romance blares, drowning every single other noise out. I whisper the lyrics, smiling. My music taste hasn't changed much. The rock bands that Kai listened to are still forever embedded into my brain. But I have a feeling that if I listened to them, they would all be way too much.

My walk consists of kicking stones at cars, and walking from side to side of the white line by the road. It is a long walk. In fact, I am not even surprised that I am late for my classes. But I don't walk any faster, and I don't feel like rushing to beat the bell. Instead I just walk into first hour, wincing as the teacher points me out.

"Miss Alexander, you're thirty minutes late. Would you like to explain?"

"No, not really. And it's Miss Braxton, by the way." I sit in the back, quite surprised no one is sitting there at the moment.

Students snicker, probably just waiting for something exciting to happen in this god awful class. At this point they could be amused by anything. The teacher nods, probably not wanting to talk to the Sheriff about me in the future.

At lunch I join Ethan, Avalon, and Nakota. The girls are quiet, and trust me, I notice the fact that they all sit across from me. Not beside me, no. Ethan sits across from me, then Nakota, and Avalon. Everyone is just ignoring me, trying to put space between me and them. Everyone but one person.

"Hey, Pyro." I turn towards the voice. The source of the voice clearly makes Ethan uncomfortable. So I am not very surprised when I see Aaron.

"Evening, Asshat." I say loud enough, officially down to zero fucks. "Which nerd did you ask to come up with that one?"

His face scrunched, clearly not understanding my humor. Eventually he finds something to say. "Where is pretty boy?"

"Pretty boy? I didn't know you played for that team, Aaron." I smirked, making him frown and take a step closer.

"You're quite brave considering he isn't here to back you up."

"I am not afraid to fight you, Aaron. You might have the biceps and football background. But fighting isn't all about strength." I rise to my feet, barely half Aaron's height.

"Then what is it about?"

"Will."

He chuckles. "You think you are the big shot, is that it? You come back and expect everyone to kneel in front of you and pity you. I was kicked off the team, you bitch!" He clenches his teeth to the point where they might crack.

"Shouldn't have shoved me." I shrug it off with a smirk.

"You know, I do feel bad for you. I feel bad that everyone has abandoned you. But maybe you'd still have a family if you hadn't barbecued them."

Kill him. Kai says, more like whispers, in the back of my mind. I want to, everything in me seems to agree.

"Sim, don't do it." It's Ethan, pulling me back. He gets up from his seat, trying to calm me with his small voice. I'm not sure what does it, but I snap back to reality and sit back down.

Even though he's been ignoring me, I find myself growing calmer knowing I have someone to back me up. Even though I could be arrested in the future, Ethan hasn't given up on me.

Aaron grunts, clearly pleased with himself. I settle down back in my seat, watching as Aaron turns his back.

Later. That's a promise.