Finally together

Epilogue

Although in those moments when the pain recedes, I begin to justify myself, but this is not for long, just for a couple of minutes, and then all over again... Ah, Sanem, ah... But it would have been different if you had listened to Can!

"Dear, just a little more and it will all be over," my doctor's kind eyes and his calm, quiet voice had a calming effect on me. I believed him that there was just a little bit left, but why didn't it end? I no longer understood what I wanted more at that moment - to see my baby's tiny wrinkled face or to be free from this pain.

No, nevertheless, most of all I couldn't wait to see my girl, to feel her small soft body on my chest, to press my lips to her reddened face, distorted from crying, to feel her movement not only inside myself.

"Come on, dear, try... Just a little more... One more try and it will all be over," the midwife persuaded me, but I no longer had the strength. I felt tired, completely exhausted, and it was terribly frightening. What if I can't, I won't be able to give life to the baby. What if right now, when there are only a few seconds left before her birth, I don't have enough strength for this?

"Caan!" I croaked, as if he could help with something. No, he can't help me now! I have to do this myself! Right now, experiencing incomparable pain and pressure, I finally fully understood why my mother always boasted so much about "giving the world two daughters."

Only now I realized that this was actually her merit. After all, if she didn't have enough strength then, if she gave up, if she was scared, I wouldn't be there! How is it even possible that there is no Sanem Divit in the world just because her mother gave up! No way! I will give the world Yildiz Divit! I will do it!

Having waited for the next contraction and not paying attention to the unbearable pain tearing me apart, I pushed with all my might, trying to push the baby out.

"Well done! Smart girl!" the midwife praised me, and I wanted to grab something and throw it at her. I wanted everyone around me to be silent, otherwise I wouldn't hear the baby's cry. I froze in anticipation of another contraction, but there was none. And I no longer had the strength... And my consciousness flew away somewhere, circling me around the room or the room around me... I'm sorry, baby, but I can't do it anymore... Can, I'm sorry... I no longer have the strength... I fell into the darkness...

Something wet touched my chest... Someone took my hand and lifted it, putting it on something soft and mobile. I couldn't open my eyes to see what it was, I couldn't figure out where I was and what was happening around me. I didn't have the strength to do it, like in a nightmare when you want to do something, but you can't. But as soon as the piercing cry of a child touched my ears, sharp and unexpected, I opened my eyes, forgetting about everything in the world. Little baby Yildiz lay on my chest, screaming heartrendingly and demanding my attention.

"My star... My little joy..."

"Sanem!" Can appeared on the threshold, pale, disheveled, and incredibly tired. For a minute, I even felt ashamed that I felt sorry for myself a few minutes ago. Can looked very exhausted.

"Can..." I wanted to reach out to him, but I couldn't. "Can, look! I gave the world our baby!"

"I can see that, my only one," he leaned down and pressed his lips to my lips. How pleasant it was... As if he poured into me the strength that I had absolutely nothing left of, he charged me. Can pulled away from my lips and pressed himself to my ear

"Thank you, my love, for giving me so much happiness."

"You are so stupid, Can Divit..." well, how can I explain to this person that it is he who gives me happiness. He is my happiness. Without him, nothing makes sense... Not happiness, not love, not even life...